What to Get My Geek for Valentine's Day?

A reader writes "Help!!! I've been dating my geek for three months and I'm in a bit of a dilemma. So I thought I'd ask the men of Slashdot what they would want as a Valentine's Day gift. I'm looking for something out of the ordinary that will knock his socks off. Somthing clever, crafty and unique. The budget is $100. My geek's interests are typical geek fare, games, computers, music and gadgetry. So! You, men of Slashdot, tell me what you would want to recieve for Valentine's day and help me make my geek happy."

Blow job

[Anonymous Coward]

give him a blow job

Re:Blow job

[strictnein (318940)]

How is that off-topic? Every (male) geek wants one of those for valentines day.

Who are these mods?

Re:Blow job

[TwistedSquare (650445)]

Clearly the mods were looking for a "too explicit for a public message board" mod ;-)

Re:Blow job

[MisanthropicProggram (597526)]

When I got one, I stopped being a geek. It's kind of like Samson's hair - you cut it off, and he loses he strength. With geeks, they have sex and they lose their programming ability.
Since my experince, I have no idea how to use objects or even semi-colons!

Re:Blow job

[Anonymous Coward]

Since my experince, I have no idea how to use objects or even semi-colons!

If you aren't using objects or colons, you've got to be having some pretty boring sex.

(Sorry, but someone had to say it)

Re:Blow job

[Anonymous Coward]

Sort of related to that . . .

While in a sex store buying stuff for one of my friend's bachelorette party, I saw some instructional tapes. One of them was simply labelled "Fellatio." I had the idea of buying it for my girlfriend on Valentine's Day. I think it might be fun . . . .

And if she doesn't like it, I can just say, " That's alright, I just got it as a gag gift."

Re:Blow job

[wittyesotericmoniker (743663)]

Yay, we found one job that will definitely cost more if outsourced.

The Best Store

[rockwood (141675)]

That's easy, almost anything from Think Geek [thinkgeek.com]

Re:The Best Store

[darkov (261309)]

Sheesh, talk about your sycophantic posts, Were you angling for a discount. Here are more a few more realistic things you can get:

- get undressed and possibly into a leather and chains (with whip) outfit. Substitute rubber or lingerie according to (his) taste.
- get out the KY
- get a couple of your/his friends around
- get at it

If he gets presents like these, he's soon be much happier about turning older each year.

Re:The Best Store

[PhotoBoy (684898)]

Geeks also appreciate it when you dress up as Princess Leia in her slave outfit from Return of the Jedi.

Re:The Best Store

[Mattcelt (454751)]

Agreed. There is lots of cool stuff there.

I would also suggest a Leatherman [leatherman.com], if he doesn't already have one. Most models are in the $30-$70(US) range, and are very handy. I have actually given them to two of my past girlfriends (no jokes about the reasons for them being ex's, please). They both loved them.

Re:The Best Store

[jeffehobbs (419930)]

I would also suggest a Leatherman

I don't know if that's such a great idea [google.com].

~jeff

Re:The Best Store

[Deltan (217782)]

Heh the HTTP Panties Valenties Box is pretty funny. http://www.thinkgeek.com/interests/valentines/6796 / [thinkgeek.com]

Although they forgot some errors that would be equally amusing

402 "Payment Required"
405 "Method not Allowed"
411 "Length Required"
500 "Internal Server Error" (you know, for that time of the month)
503 "Service Unavailable"

If you've read this far I'm sure you can tell I'll be on my own for Valentine's Day. Fuck.

ThinkGeek Valentine guide

[bstil (652204)]

Check out the ThinkGeek Valentine guide [thinkgeek.com].

one suggestion

[YoYofella (184938)]

stop calling him GEEK every other sentence. That's a start.

Re:one suggestion

[dszd0g (127522)]

Hey, some of us are geeks and proud of it. I have no problem with someone calling me a geek when it isn't done in an insulting manner. Even then I often take it as a compliment.

This is a good thread. My gf has a hard time shopping for me sometimes. I maintain a list of DVDs I want, and she often snags something off that list. A lot of geeks maintain a wish list somewhere. Other times, it is just something I've mentioned I've wanted.

Although, one time I had been mentioning wanting an umbrella for a while, but hadn't gotten my butt to go shopping for one. So she hands me this blue-purple umbrella. For some reason, women seem to think purple works for guys. I had to be careful not to offend her, but I ended up going to the store and returning it for a nicer black one.

I do have some male friends that like purple, but most of them are gay. The general advice about shopping for men, still applies to most geeks.

The difference for geeks is they like cool toys and often care a lot about quality. If you get something that normally comes in a cheap plastic, but they make a nice shiny metal one. Most people might not care, but a lot of geeks will like the nice shiny metal one. I wish I had an example, but I hope I got the idea accross.

Combine his two biggest interests

[PollGuy (707987)]

and get yourself some coded underwear [thinkgeek.com].

Just don't get it backwards-- wear the 200 ones when you are gearing to go.

Hmm....

[ZeroConcept (196261)]

Dress as:
- Seven of Nine (Star Trek)
- Princess Leah (You know, the mini stuff)

What else? ohh...he might wanna have sex with you but our kind is used to rejection so it should be ok.

Re:Hmm....

[Deltan (217782)]

If Seven of Nine is too complicated of an outfit, just plain naked works well too.

PS- If he shouts, "That's a lot of polygons" ignore it. S'all good.

Lucky bastard...

[thedoktor (526726)]

It's not enough that he has a girlfriend, she has the brains to get him a geek toy too. Like i said - lucky bastard

Asking a Geek?!

[Anonymous Coward]

I'm sure most men here would just like a girlfriend at all.

Maybe you could get him some soap, a razor or decent clothes.

A room that is NOT in the basement would probably be good, too.

Sunlight is also a good possibility.

Re:Asking a Geek?!

[Oopsz (127422)]

Good lord! Are you saying that the rumours of the daystar are true?!?

Something non-geeky

[jdepew (192259)]

If he's anything like most of us geeks, we'll buy the geek toys ourselves to make sure we get exactly what we want.

So, my suggestion is, get him something non-geeky that he'd like or has commented on that shows you realize he is much more than just Geek.

Re:Something non-geeky

[lcde (575627)]

I would have to second this comment. I think if my gf bought me a HD or a thinkgeek t-shirt i would be kind of disapointed because those are things that i would just go out and buy if i need. I would rather have something that would remind me of her whenever i see it.

To all those who said "BJ"

[Anonymous Coward]

She asked what _her_ geek, who HAS a girl, would like. Not what YOU want so badly.

Tools!

[JoeCommodore (567479)]

$100? How about some useful tool or hardware necessity. First thought would be one of those Keychain USB drives. If you want him to think of you often get him something he finds useful and will use a lot.

Hrm

[GigsVT (208848)]

This story is kinda fishy.

"A Reader" writes... A reader of Slashdot that doesn't know what a geek wants as a gift, Okkaaay.

This whole thing seems like a big shill story to get people to post links to ThinkGeek, which is of course owned by the same company as Slashdot.

Re:Hrm

[GigsVT (208848)]

Wait, you are actually suggesting that a non-geek figured out the user interface of Slashdot?? :)

What do you *both* want?

[Dolohov (114209)]

It's easy to give a geek gifts. ThinkGeek.com alone should satisfy you there. For V's Day, you might want to look for something you'd both enjoy, so that his immediate response isn't "Must go off and use new gadget alone!" Two-player videogames you're willing to play with him, DVDs you'll both like, that kind of thing. Stuff like books or single-player video games can wait until his birthday.

My suggestion

[Anonymous Coward]

All geeks would love an Windows XP license or subscription to MSDN.

(I'm jealous and trying to break you up)

A quick search on google

[armando_wall (714879)]

Well, lady, just typing "the perfect present for a geek" [google.com] in google gave me some interesting links...

This one might help you [presentpicker.com].

A poem from the heart.

[Aaron England (681534)]

Roses are red
Violets are blue
All of my base
Are belong to you

Re:A poem from the heart.

[tangent3 (449222)]

You mean:

Roses are #FF0000
Violets are #0000FF

Amazon's hidden "Geek" section

[slothdog (3329)]

Amazon has a well-hidden Early Adopers Store [amazon.com] that has all the latest gadgetry and toys. Lots of fun stuff there....

Love

[LamerX (164968)]

Being a lonely geek myself, I would say that I would be happy just getting to spend my day with a girl I love. The only thing that I would ever want would be her company for that day. There is no material object on the planet that would make me as happy as just getting to spend time someone I love. Just to hold her in my arms, and enjoy her company. Maybe sitting out in a park bench in the middle of the night looking out over a lake at the cityscape.

Re:Love

[aanand (705284)]

Not even an iPod? Dude, they've got 40GB ones now.

Really consider sex

[GoofyBoy (44399)]

Unfortunately "give him sex!" comments are getting modded down.

Seriously, healthly people like sex. Good caring sex, more so.

You get him $100 worth of somethng from ThinkGeek and its something anyone could give, really lacks creativity and will be forgotten in a year.

Hot, wild monkey sex with a liberal dose of caring and understanding towards your partner's needs will blow his/her mind away, is going to be unique to each other and will strengthen your relationship.

If, for your personal reasons, you are waiting to get married or whatever, then head over to ThinkGeek.

Re:Really consider sex

[Anonymous Coward]

Hot, wild monkey sex

Monkey sex? Pff, I'd rather just have an army of monkeys. With that I could take over the world and get sex whenever I wanted.

A memory is the best present one can give

[MonkeysKickAss (735143)]

You need to be original, so what you should do is not buy him just anything but you should give him a memory. Things can break, but a memory is alwayys there so plan a roantic dinner with candles, inscence, rent his favorite movie, and prepare a home cooked meal (if you can't cook buy something and make it look as if you prepared it). You don't want to out do him because then he will hate himself, and after dinner go for a walk and then finally go back to your place put on the movie, cuddle up next to him and just enjoy. Thats the best present you can give him, because a memory like that is priceless. Hope I helped and good luck

March 14

[Gothmolly (148874)]

More importantly, what happens on the 'other' holiday [steakandbjday.com]? Don't 'stiff' your geek on that day either! (pun intended)

One Sugestion

[greysky (136732)]

Call me old fashioned, but even though I am a geek, I don't really want or expect geeky gifts for valentine's day. That's what Christmas and birthdays are for. Is it just me or are gifts for this occasion suposed to be romantic in nature and not practical? That said, $100 would probably cover the tab for a nice romantic dinner out at a nice restraunt. Or, if he's geeky enough to still live in his parents' basement, you could always rent a hotel room...

A sincere smile, an embrace ...

[JMZorko (150414)]

... are the things that meant the most to me. Spend some time with him, go somewhere really cool, have an incredibly wonderful and intimate conversation, witness a beautiful sunset, stay up all night and contemplate the stars, the planet, and the joy of being with one another. Sing him a song if you're inclined!

These all last much longer, and go much deeper, than any consumable, in my opinion.

Regards,

John

Something special

[reignbow (699038)]

Well, so far everybody has suggested some kind of sexual favour... but either it's happened already or you have reasons why not. Oh well. Here are ideas you can actually tell him about in front of your parents:

• take him to the luxus sauna for a day. Complete relaxation, total comfort. Gets you off at 60$
• Get him a nice piece of decoration he can use to brighten his computer/workplace/shrine with. Good modern art, some kind of astronomy picture, something to focus his eyes on when he needs to calm down after some bughunting
• Any book he always wanted but could never afford? Get it and a few tidbits from the left-over money.
• Invite him to dinner to a nice restaurant. Something classy, but not necessarily posh. Good food is a must.
• Organize a surprise network party for him
• Music or a game he likes.
• I think you get the drift. Do
• not give him a bulk network card, no matter how useful it would be, because, while it would make him happy, it would also lack the certain something. What's important is something that makes the gift seem thoughtful, so either good presentation or a truly original idea are necessary. Hope I could help :)

Victoria Secrets

[rossz (67331)]

Something that you wear. Trust me, this would be better than any gadget you could possibly purchase.

Asking on Slashdot

[GrouchoMarx (153170)]

It's Valentine's day. Save the hardware and gadgetry for his birthday, Christmas, etc. Valentine's day, for one day, you can be sentimental, even to a techie. The geekiest you'd want to go would be, like, "his and hers" memory cards or something. :-) Something you've made yourself, even if it is tech-related, is best.

Of course, you could just let him see this thread. A girlfriend who likes her geek beau enough that she'll ask the nexus of geekdom how to best make a geek happy? Just the knowledge that a girl cares that much and knows him that well is a major gift in itself. Maybe frame the thread or something. :-)

• Widget from ThinkGeek: $30
• New iPod: $300
• New gaming rig: $3000
• A girlfriend willing to say "I love my geek and want to show it" on Slashdot: Priceless

Rez + Trance Vibe (Re:Not really a geek )

[StCredZero (169093)]

If he plays games, and he has a PS2, get him Rez with the Trance Vibrator [gamegirladvance.com]. It might be a bit of a rush by now.

Re:Computer Parts

[acidrain69 (632468)]

Yeah, and for the $100 stated in the article, that is like a 5" LCD. drool!

Re:Computer Parts

[fafaforza (248976)]

Yeah. Nothing will be more fun for him than trying to take back the CPU that doesn't fit his motherboard, or the ram he has no use for since his slots are already filled, or the 20GB ATA66 5400RPM hard drive.

My advice: let him pick the parts himself.

Re:The gift he'll cherish

[s20451 (410424)]

I've often wondered why there are no girls on slashdot. Now I know.

Re:Actually...

[Anonymous Coward]

he is probably the guy that said blowjob