Subversive Gifts for New College Students?

openyourmind asks: "A friend's daughter is going to college, and I want to send her a package to help her in school. What kinds of things did you wish you had, but couldn't get, in college? I have already included a lockpick set, a UVmarking pen, and an LED flashlight in her care package. What else? Legal items only, please."

How about...

[Binestar]

You can always give her a can of Mace and a stun gun, depending on which college she is going to of course.

Legal Items only?

[ralico]

That takes all the fun out of it!

Seriously, if you are looking to get her something that she can't afford on her own, may I suggest a pda? I sure wish I had one, esp to remind me of my projects and homework due.

Subversive Gifts?

[quantaman]

Uhhh... I'm not trying to jump to conclusions or anything but, exactly what are you trying to subvert your freind's daughter into doing? Then again maybe we don't want to know all the details after all...

Subscription...

[rlangis]

to cliff-notes.com?

Food

[CoffeeDad]

It may sound silly, but... seriously, food. Snack items and coupons for cheap or free dinners are good, but simple things you wouldn't think about like salt, pepper, spices, etc. - anything to make that brick of noodles she'll be living on more closely resemble something edible!

- my $0.02

Recording

[handsomepete]

I know it's cliched, but I would've liked to have had one of those handheld tape recorders for lectures. I had no problems listening in high school, but college somehow weakend that ability in me. Being able to take notes after class is a good thing.

Re:Lockpick? That's not legal everywhere

[Anonymous Coward]

For that matter, other things have variable legality, too. For example, mace/pepper spray is against the law in Washington, D.C. (as are handguns.)

DC is obviously much safer because of it! *cough*

well now...

[SGDarkKnight]

mac and cheese... lots of it... 3 years worth is usually good... and gone within the first few months...

Are you sure you meant "legal"?

[Anomolous Cow Herd]

A lockpicking set? Good God, man, read up on the law before you do shit like that! The people who carry those (locksmiths) have to be specially licensed to do so. Otherwise, it's quite easy to get arrested for carrying what could only be tools for breaking and entering. There is nearly no "dual use" with such devices: if something is locked, it was probably meant to stay that way unless you have the key.

What are you planning on your friend's daughter doing, anyway? The included LED light sounds like you're hoping for a career in burglery. What in the world would you be doing with these at college? I went through 4 years of undergrad and 5 more years to get my PhD in CS, but I never found myself having to break into other people's property.

Besides, the gun nuts (no offense intended) at this site will tell you that one of the best ways to get shot and killed is to break and enter on an armed person's premesis.

Gift Ideas

[gururise]

A Lockpick set is probably illegal (depending upon which state she attends college in). In California, for instance, it is illegal for any person to posses a lockpick set without being a licensed locksmith.

Other great ideas would be a Sharp Zaurus SL-5500 [myzaurus.com] with an 802.11b card and the kismet wireless sniffing software [killefiz.de]. Great for wardriving, or just walking around the dorms, sniffing for open networks.

The other thing you should consider is, are these the values you want to instill in a new college student? Sure hacking, and messing around can be fun, but in today's society, there is a fine line between having fun and breaking the law!

Gururise

What I wish I had taken

[unicron]

After one year in college, my stupid ass got the boot. I had to leave my girl, and I wish someone would've sit me down and said "You will never meet another one like this again. She's beautiful, intelligent, wonderfully cynical, interesting, fun, and for some reason she's in love with your stupid ass. So don't fuck it up. Go to class, study, pay attention. I know that this freedom is going to be knew to you, but you have to remain a bigger person and control it. Just because you can skip class and not get busted by anyone doesn't mean you should. Watch the partying. Tomorrow is going to come no matter what, do you want to be well rested and still have your money or hung over and broke? Pick your friends carefully. Choose those that know how to have a good time but know when it's time to sit up and hit the books. And always remember: Theatre Majors are the epitome of laziness."

Thinking back...

[daoine]

..I wished I had brought

-A decent pocket knife
-Duct Tape
-A decent baby-sized tool box -- with a good hammer, screwdrivers (flat & philips head), pliers, and all the other little goodies.
-Earplugs
-A beer..err...soda cozy
-Quarters, quarters, and more quarters

Re:wrist bands

[purpledinoz]

Wristbands, This is definitely a must! And a some solvent to wash away the marks they put on your hands with a big black marker.

A few suggestions

[pclinger]

I assume this person has a computer and that they are now moving away to college (that's what it sounds like). As a college student myself, these are some things which always come in handy:

1) Quarters
Think laundry. You always need quarters. Just send a couple rolls and it should last a while. Make sure you tell her what it is for so she doesn't just go spend it

2) Tools
Such as a hammer, screw drivers, etc. If you live in the dorms, no one has these types of things and they are hard to come by. Anyone who has tools is instantly popular.

3) Network Card?
If this person has used dialup all their life and never had/needed a network card, they will need one now to get online while at campus.

There is a lot more, you will find many more suggestions from other posters.

Not subversive, but...

[eison]

It's not a matter of 'can't get', it's a matter of 'can't afford' or 'can't get to the store' or 'didn't think to buy'. Ignoring traditional gender roles, what would be really useful for college:
4-in-1 Screwdriver. Hammer. Simple voltmeter. Drill. Electrical tape.
Towel (a really really nice fluffy new one, the kind your parents would have a heart attack if you used to wash the car or clean up a spill since it wasn't an old beat up towel. Write on it with permanent marker, something like "use for stuff your parents would cringe at you using a nice towel for" or something like that).

Re:well now...

[Cheeko]

A bottle opener (one of the good metal ones), a lighter and a case of Ramen, should be handy as well.

Protection

[drdidg]

And by this I mean like mace or a little key ring sized pepper spray. Have to protect your body right?

Your asking this question on /.???

[Eric Damron]

Come on, this site is 99.95% male Geeks and Nerds. Do you really think that any of us have a clue about what a normal female student would want??

Pass my sliderule would ya?

Re:lockpick set?

[majestyk2000]

Small piece of business advice...if you are working on a beach where the nearest 'other' locksmith is 40 minutes away, you need to be charging TWICE what they do, not half. Supply and demand is a harsh bitch sometimes.

Re:Legal Items only?

[r00tarded]

i found an abundance of 'pencils' and 'paper' on campus, they are excellent for keeping track of such things.

How about nothing. Here's why...

[gosand]

I didn't have jack when I went to college. I spent $2200 of MY OWN MONEY on a PC, which was a 386DX-33. It wasn't for surfing the net, the net didn't exist yet. (unless you count FTP and Gopher). It was to compile programs so I didn't have to trek to the lab at 3am. I had a couple of friends who ran a BBS, but that was about it. Not to sound like an old fart, but I did it on my own. I worked my way through school, didn't sit on my ass and play on the internet all day, or go to raves, or spend hours in front of a game console. My parents didn't pay my way through school, and I am glad for it. They didn't give me a credit card to run up, I got my own - and I paid off the bills every month. I didn't have a pager, a cell-phone, or a PDA. And don't tell me that those things are necessary nowadays - they aren't. Stop friggin coddling kids, and let them do things on their own. Maybe then we wouldn't have so many whiney brats who expect the world to owe them, because they are used to getting everything they want. And this isn't because I am jealous, it will be better for them in the long run if they do it themselves. They will learn how to actually appreciate something, and the value of self-reliance.

BUT... if you really want to help her, get her some food. Good food. I lived on Ramen noodles, Little Debbie snack cakes, frozen pizzas, and Keystone Light. When you are living on the cheap, that is all you can afford. Give her a good, healthy, care-package of solid nutritious food-stuff. Don't give her food money, cause kids will spend it on crap they don't need and skimp on the food.

Marketing Troll?

[Mignon]

What are the chances this Ask Slashdot is from a marketing troll at ThinkGeek, for example?

Re:A few suggestions

[GigsVT]

Also handy, and often forgotten is a shower basket and sandals to wear in the shower specifically. No one thinks about the public showers until they need to take the first one.

A dirt devil stick vacuum is also an item that will make you popular in the dorms.

Another good thing to have is DoS tools to use on the asshole next door when he plays his lame-ass MP3s on his "look at me I'm so fucking hip" subwoofer system.

Great idea!

[Anonymous Coward]

Hell yea I hope she finds a chick like that and streams her room on the web!!!

Stash Box/Safe?

[e2d2]

Every college kid should have a good assortment of stash boxes. I have one in my vehicle, put in by a local custom car shop, and a few in my house that I built myself. They are great for hiding stuff that you might want to keep out of normal view A decent safe never hurt but given the tight spaces that usually confines college kids I'd suggest a small fire box with a simple key or number lock.

here's a cheapie stash example:
http://www.pentagondefense.com/booksafe1 .html

~trust no one, always roll your own tin foil hats

Re:well now...

[cmpalmer]

My college roommate ate on about $0.50 per day -- bowl of Captain Crunch (economy size box) for breakfast, half a box of mac and cheese for lunch, the other half for supper, one or two multi-vitamins a day to make it a "balanced meal". Of course, that doesn't count the several gallons of beer on weekends.

George Foreman Grill

[sprintkayak]

Great for dorm life. Perfect for late night meal after the caffeteria is closed.
Knocks out the fat!

Re:Thinking back...

[TGK]

Wana go hardcore? A shrinkwraper. Most college bookstores won't take books back at full price once the shrinkwrap is off. If you have a shrinkwraper you can re-wrap them and typicaly save $75+ on your returned books.

That... and you can sell shrinkwraping service.

Re:Camera

[Anonymous Coward]

As a citizen of the most litigated society ever, I find the old saying 'ignorance is no exuse", though legally true, hard to swallow. I would be surprised to find a law student who was aware of more than 50% of our national and local laws.

Re:Condoms

[kirn_malinus]

and band aids. i would have never thought to get myself band aids, but the first time i cut myself on something in my computer and was bleeding all over the place i was very happy that mommy had.

Theatre Majors.

[Wombat]

I'm sorry, but I'm going to have to differ with your statement that "Theatre Majors are the epitome of laziness." I think, as in any major, you get those who are dedicated and those who are slackers. Granted, perhaps a few more slackers end up in the theatre area because it's more subjective and there are fewer rigorous homework deadlines than in, say, Astrophysics.

From personal experience I and many of my friends have worked our asses off in our university's Theatre department. And that's what one has to be willing to do if one has a strong desire to be an artist professionally. The ones who slacked off will inevitably be waiting tables, while the hard workers at least have a fighting chance.

Other than that, you give pretty good advice. ;-)

-Wombat,
Michigan State [msu.edu] class of 2002, BA Theatre [msu.edu], BS Astrophysics [msu.edu].
Examples of hardwork:
Lighting Design Portfolio [msu.edu]
Acting Resume [msu.edu]
and Your Mom [yourmomimprov.com](Improv Comedy)

Re:What I wish I had taken

[Anonymous Coward]

You had one year in college, so I can only assume you were 18. In which case, it's a pretty safe bet you would've broken up within 3 or 4 years anyway.

College changes people too much and they grow apart. I knew a ton of people who were madly in love their first year of college, but I can't think of any of them who are still together.

I'm not trying to discount what you had, I'm just saying that you shouldn't beat yourself up over it. Love comes, love goes, and when you're ready, you'll find love that stays.

Our Bodies, Ourselves

[cybermage]

Not that she won't have enough to read already, but send her a copy of Our Bodies, Ourselves [ourbodiesourselves.org]. Part sex education, part woman education. All women should read this book. Heck, all men should read this book.

If you want subversive, this is it, by the way. Women get the short end of the stick in both sex ed and medical attention. This book fills in the gaps. Think of it as an owners manual for womanhood.

Re:What I wish I had taken

[griblik]

Took me three years to get that far.

I fucked it up too.

The biggest gift you could give would the space to make her own mistakes. Lost the girl, got a pants degree, and I'm still doing better than most of the people I went to Uni with.

There's time to be well rested (never had any money as a student) when you're old. You'll never have time to be young again.

Don't Give a Girl "Guy" Presents

[scotpurl]

While many girls appreciate these gifts, it's derned close to that "my husband bought me a romantic clothes washer for our anniversary," or even, "my boyfriend changed the oil in my car for Valentine's day," or also, "My neighbor bought me a waffle iron for Christmas."

While we dudes appreciate a fine tool, it's not Chick stuff. The clothes washer and the waffle iron come with the implication, "MAKE USE OF THAT FINE APPLIANCE FOR ME RIGHT NOW YOU LAZY WOMAN. I HAVE A GAME TO WATCH. ONLY SUMMON ME IF THERE IS A FIRE OR SEX."

The lock pick set will be forgotten in the back of a drawer. The fine flashlight will be stolen at the first Rave.

Give the girl cash. Best gift. Accepted in 200+ countries and on 7 continents. No ID needed. Don't leave home without it.

Re:A few suggestions

[Anonymous Coward]

Another good thing to have is DoS tools to use on the asshole next door when he plays his lame-ass MP3s on his "look at me I'm so fucking hip" subwoofer system.

a quick knock on the door and you saying "can you keep it down, i'm trying to study," and you'll find that most neighbors are pretty accomodating. however, if i ever found out that some prick next door was trying to DoS me because he thought my music was too loud, and you better believe that i'd go out and sell my car to buy the biggest goddam subwoofers that i could find, and i'd prop them up against the wall facing you.

a little consideration goes a long way. try to be civil. plus, a little human contact couldn't hurt

A sense of identity

[Anonymous Coward]

I spent, and watched my friends spend, the first eighteen years of their lives defining what sort of a person they were. And then most of them dropped their identity as soon as they walked in the dorm and acted like everyone else, or at least how they expected everyone else to act. So many people get to college and because of the parental warnings, the movies, the jokes see it as a big kegparty and they work to act this out (to the point that my roommate is right now playing beirut on friggan Yahoo! games).

You should send a description of what kind of a person she seems to have become at this point, so that when the pressure comes down and she begins to falter she might stumble upon it and realize who she's leaving behind.

Honestly, don't be such a hard ass

[seldolivaw]

So things were tougher in your day. Things nearly always were. But that's the kind of logic that would have us all living in caves and avoiding fire because raw meat was good enough for our grand-daddies. I'm at university, and you know what? My PDA is really useful, so screw you. It's not necessary, but neither was your 386. It just makes life easier, and probably better. By taking care of the simple things for her, she'll be able to concentrate on her *real* goals: aceing her degree, but more importantly running up huge debts, going to raves, and spending hours wasting time with her friends. Because university (or college) is what turns you into the person you will be for the rest of your life, and if you have to spend it busting your ass just to afford food, then it turns you into what, apparently, you are: a hard-ass with no sense of fun. I'd rather be the mollycoddled, whiny brat, if it's all the same to you.

And in case you're wondering, I don't scrounge off my parents. I paid for my £2000 computer myself, with money I earned working 9-5, and the same goes for most of the rest of the stuff that I own.

Re:Theatre Majors.

[TheGeneration]

I was a Psychology major, and Computer Science major. There is a GIGANTIC/HUGE/GRANDEOUSLY/MONSTROUSLY/BIG difference between an arts major and a sciences major. I thought Psych was hard until I picked up the second major of CS. Suddenly I went from a B psych student to a straight A psych student having realized that NOTHING in Psych was hard compared to the rigors of lower division CS courses. (Our lower division CS courses were meant to weed out those who weren't supposed to be there.)

Leatherman

[type40]

When I first moved out into my own place I got a next day air package from my exhippie uncle. It had a Leatherman Wave (with the leather belt pouch) inside with hand written post-it saying, "This is your life line, don't lose it." I'll be damed if he wasn't right. So far its fixed cars (import and domistic) computers (mac and pc), Stereos (one Aiwa and a one old ass RCA Victrola) and opened more beers than some bar tenders.

PS. You don't need a lock pick set for B&A, That leatherman worked just fine for breaking into that fire station (long, very kinky story).

Re:What I wish I had taken

[zerocool^]

Dude. Don't worry. It can still work out for you.

I was in same boat - go to school as engineer, fail because it's so fucking hard, and i had so much freedom to... not go...

I look back now and realize several things:

1.) the time i spent hanging out with the girl, ensuring that the girl stayed with me, i should have spent studying, and as a result, i would have done better, stayed in school, and still been with her. I realize now, had I not failed out, we'd still be together. (read on)

2.) The time that i took off of school, i thought at first was permanant. I was workin 40 a week for the man [bestbuy.com] and i hated my life. I finally realized that in order to do something i was going to have to go to college. So i went back.

3.) Also in the time i took off, i realized something: I would rather do something that i love with my life than something that everyone thinks i should do because i'm "the computer nerd". I switched from engineering to history, and i'm going to be a high school history teacher. For right now i'm a network admin, but it's not what i want to do for the rest of my life.

4.) If i hadn't failed out, i would have never lost the girl and found THE GIRL. THE GIRL (for she deserves all caps status) is awesome. She likes beer, sex, football, computer games, and dinner. She's 6 feet tall, so i don't have to bend over to kiss her. She's pretty much perfect, and she loves me. Don't count on the fact that you missed THE GIRL, you could have only missed the girl.

It still can work out.

~Will

What you really need when going to college

[pz]

Going off to college means, for many, real independence for the first time. So the first things you should think about including are in support of that, or, in related fashion, in support of what happens when that breaks down. Like a pre-paid phone card with a gazillion minutes on it. And, perhaps more importantly, your phone number enscribed on that phone card so that she can call an adult who is not her parent for non-judgmental advice, followed by the words "call any time of day or night." And when she does call at 3am, make sure you wake up, listen, and provide the support she needs.

As oft-mentioned in other replies, condoms. GOOD ones. And then, bone up on emergency anti-pregnancy procedures for that 3am call asking, "ohmigod Uncle Bob -- the condom broke, what do I do?"

An open account with a local taxi service so that she never, ever, ever has to worry about getting a ride home. The means to limit abuses of this are up to you.

Alcohol. The best place to learn about drinking is in the private, protected confines of your own dorm room. (Note, there are serious legality issues here which vary from state to state. Don't do something stupid and blame it on me.)

Anti-hangover remedies. My favorite is Berocca [berocca.co.uk]. Send a case. Ibuprofen. Send lots.

HIV home test kits (which are really home-sampling kits which you then send to a central lab for analysis). Not cheap, but she should have any guy she's thinking of having sex with tested.

*Assuming* she knows how to use basic handtools, a small toolbox with decent quality hammer, screwdrivers, and pliers is great. If she doesn't know how to use these tools, it is still a good idea, but not nearly as important. From your suggestion of lockpicks and flashlight, one might surmise she is perhaps mechanically inclined. If so, add small pocket knife, magnifying loupe, a pocket-sized set of jewlers tools. At the other end of the physical scale, a crowbar and a 3-lb sledge. A good digital multimeter (eg, Fluke 77-III or equivalent).

The person who recommended flip-flops and a shower basket was right on the money. Add some decent (and decent-sized) soap and a couple of small travel-sized bottles of her favorite shampoo and conditioner (or other toiletries).

Now, to be really *subversive*, send a set of infrared goggles, available at surplus houses everywhere. Add in works by Kant, Ionesco, Wittgenstein, Chekov and Orwell. A couple of remote listening devices. Books on how to swear in a dozen languages. Assuming she's going to college in the US, plane tickets to Europe (put those gazillion FF miles to work!). Safety pins (the most universally useful items, after knives). Fake wedding rings. Falsies (see the posting about breast implants and their universal utility). Wigs of different color or style from her normal hair. A get-out-of-jail-free card (see the phone card with your number on it, above).

But the most subversive thing you could possibly give is: encouragement.

Re:Camera

[Anonymous Coward]

What that doesn't tell you is that it is the cops and the courts which will 'prove' your intent. If you carry them around in public without a darn good reason, they are quite often considered 'burglary tools' and as such are illegal. That's one reason that I took a mailorder locksmithing course - as a "certified" locksmith I can always say I'm drumming up business....

RE: Subversive Gifts for New College Students?

[ghengismcbangus]

Someone's already suggested tools, and I heartily agree. Think of the projects you likely did: hanging pictures and shelves, building bookcases and lofts, and imagine the tools that will help. I don't know how much you're planning to spend, but, here's a list of tools I used all the time during my college years:

NB: Don't bother buying cheap tools! remember: The bitterness of poor quality will be remembered long after the sweetness of low price has been forgotten.
The results of using a poor-quality tool vary from a frustrating experience when a hand tool almost does what it's supposed to, to a permanently-disfiguring accident when an under-powered saw jams, kicks back, and slices digits. If money is tight, it is better to buy good tools used than lousy tools new.

• Makita 9.6V cordless drill w/drill bits and driver bits - a total workhorse - I bought mine in 1987, used it all through school, then professionally for ten years. The only thing I've ever replaced are the NiCd batteries.
  This thing can drill holes and drive screws all day long. The entire entertainment industry runs on this tool.
• Saw - electric circular if you're going high $$$; high quality hand saw otherwise
• Hand Tools -
  • Good 20oz. forged hammer - Estwing is nice
  • 4-Way screwdriver - one double-ended shank, each end holding one double-ended bit
  • 30 ft. steel-bladed tape measure
  • Utility knife - I like the Stanley one that swings open butterfly-style, so you can change the blade without using a screwdriver
  • Vise-Grip brand locking pliers - accept no substitutes - there's Vise-Grip, and not exactly.
• Miscellaneous
  • Permacel Gaffer's Tape - available from theatrical/film supply houses - as useful as duct tape, but stronger, doesn't smell like dead horses, and leaves much less residue on removal
  • Assortment of screws, nails, bolts, nuts, plastic drywall anchors, etc.
  • Small tub of spackle and a flexible putty knife for filling holes made by above

I'm not going to venture into tools for electrical work - the freshman dorms probably won't afford much opportunity for adding ceiling fixtures, but if she's headed for an apartment, a pair of wire cutters, strippers, and a neon "is it hot?" tester get you pretty far.

Re:Thinking back...

[lostchicken]

Nylon Ties.

Don't want to start a fastener flame war here (have we ever had one of those, might me interesting), but the things are even mo' better than duct tape or crazyglue.

A good selection of sizes will keep wires neat, keep things (bumpers, headlights, engine parts) from falling off cars (no really, my sister has used the things for some time on her bumper...), etc.

Re:Camera

[zorander]

I find it amusing that we have this whole discussion to determine that lockpicks are only illegal if intent is there to use them illegaly....this is a moot point...breaking and entering into your professor's offices is illegal therefore sending someone lockpicks to use for this purpose is as well :)

Brian

Re:How about nothing. Here's why...

[jeko]

Let's see, two grand for a 386 puts you in college in the mid-80's. I'm going to try to put this as gently as I can, in the hopes that you might listen to it and spare some kids some grief.

I too paid for my own college. I could not afford a computer of any kind. I graduated in 1989, paid for entirely on my own dime. I too resented the frat rats who were handed everything while I worked two, and at one point, three jobs.

Now, you need to understand, that sometimes the world can change. Brace yourself, get a stiff drink, and try to cope with the fact that while lower-end wages have fallen, tuitions have multiplied.

After taking a few more courses in 1995, I realized that there is no way in hell I would have my degree if I had tried to go to school just six years after I graduated. Tuition had doubled, and for the tech-related courses, tripled. In economic terms, you had it easy.

Looking back, the kids who truly got the most out of school were the ones who didn't have to spend 50 hours a week working like I did. My kids will go to college with all the trimmings, fully funded, and I will be proud that I could give them something I didn't have.

You aren't "helping your kids grow." What you're really doing is taking your bitterness out on them.

Re:Don't Give a Girl "Guy" Presents

[Iffy Bonzoolie]

I got my girlfriend a PlayStation for Valentines Day one year. She thought it was the best Valentines Day gift she'd ever gotten.

The best gifts are things you wouldn't ever get yourself, but you find you can't live without once you have them. Cash/gift certificates might be useful, but they are terribly unthoughtful.

Besides, younger girls are far less chained to the 50's female gender roles that so many people can't get their heads around. Many girls actually like math and science, and like to hammer things or work on the car. My younger (female) cousin ASKED for a toolset last christmas. And, yes, she hugged it when she got it - but the point is that these stupid male/female roles don't make as much sense anymore. And good riddance to them!

Now, I'm going to go take a nice hot bubble bath...

-If