Funny Things You've Seen on Resumes?

noackjr asks: "Everyone wants a great job, but writing a quality resume requires creativity and a fair bit of work (we won't go into actually having the proper skills, qualifications, or experiences -- let's not cloud the issue). Alternatively, sprucing up your resume with a few choice pieces of quasi-truth might set you apart from other 'qualified' candidates (the HR person will never figure it out, right?). A friend from college included knowledge of 'C, C+, and C++' on his resume. He had worked in C and C++ and just figured there had to be a C+ as well (too bad he didn't list C+-). He ended up getting a $50,000+/yr job with a major US tech firm using that resume. Anyone else come across funny/pathetic attempts to improve a resume?"

Obviously not enough

[Datoyminaytah]

> ...knowledge of 'C, C+, and C++' on his resume.
> He had worked in C and C++ and just figured
> there had to be a C+...

He obviously had not worked with either long enough to understand the humor in the name of "C++".

Re:Programming languages

[the Man in Black]

They don't give out Nobel prizes for "Most Novel New Method to Kill People".

Actually... [216.239.37.104]

I count 16 Nobel Prize winners highlighted. Sure they didn't EXACTLY win for what their discoveries were used for, but still.

Re:Programming languages

[leitz]

Ty, I'd suggest some changes. Keep in mind I'm a sysadmin, but you'll probably see what I'm thinking. If you have 10 years of experience you've probably done quite a few projects. So, in the top of your resume list the languages you're familier with, that will start the hit counter and give interviewers a synopsis of skills and ideas on where to question you.

In the body, under each job section, list specifics: "10 years of experience programming enterprise applications like XYZ, a Java based server system and RSTUV--the C++ middleware app. My roles have included the full software development cycle from initial design using industry standard object oriented analysis techniques, through base C/C++ and Java code writing; up to design reviews for re-factoring non-object aware C code into multi-platform (Solaris/AIX/HP-UX/Linux/Windows) capable Java."

You probably get the idea. Your resume should be looked at every few months just for a word review. Pull out things you don't like doing and express the things you enjoy. Give the interviewers hooks to ask you questions in areas you are good at. If you're at the table with me I'll ask you questions about what you say you know and let you admit "I don't know" if I ask you something you've already indicated you're not strong in.

I have real work to get done: it is much easier to spend a few minutes helping you understand something than hours rebuilding a machine you trashed because you didn't admit your limits.