The Urban Geek As A Mugger Magnet?

CGP314 writes "I live in London and whenever I travel around, I feel like a huge target for muggers. Usually I take my laptop, iPod, cell phone and occasionally a PDA around with me. As with many geeks, these items hold within them far more value to me than anything I leave behind in my apartment. So I would like to know what my fellow urban geeks do to try and keep their valuables safe while traveling with them. I've switched my iPod headphones from the distinctive white to a boring black as a means of camouflage; are there any other suggestions?"

wait a minute...

[Anonymous Coward]

you go outside?

Well, in a perfect world.

[re-Verse]

Tap in to the matrix and suddenly "I know Kung-Fu

Yeah, that would be nice.

Wearable computers?

[erroneus]

Do you think THIS is one of the reasons people have been interested in wearable computer devices? So they are less of a burden to carry around with you? Hrmmm...

Now to clarify the question, is this guy a huge target because he carries too much crap or because he's huge?

Not carrying nearly enough....

[Rahga]

You'll have to check the laws in your area, but at the very least, the list is missing a knife, pepper spray, brass knuckles, and a packet of instant foam... Bite into it, then the attacker, and do your best to fake rabies. :)

Re:Not a problem here

[IAR80]

I often take a LAW with me.

A true geek...

[maxbang]

doesn't go out. Therefore, I don't really see a problem here.

Here is what you do

[FS1]

1. Don't shower for weeks on end
2. Where cloths multiple times
3. Find the dirtiest, nastiest bag you can to put your stuff in

oh wait your a geek, you already do those three things.

Problem?

[telstar]

Most of the joy of gadgets is the researching, selecting, ordering, and receiving anyway ... After you get it, it's obsolete and you've already moved onto the next new thing. Think of muggers as helpers ... They clean out the old obsolete gadgets so you can research/select/order new expensive shiny gadgets.

Camouflage

[Rick Zeman]

Travel with a girl. They'll never identify you as a geek then!

Re:off-site backups --not just for corporations

[Anonymous Coward]

Yet another Mac-zealott willing to sacrifice his life for his Mac...

Re:its all about the accessories

[Suburbanpride]

I carry my shiny 12 inch Powerbook inside an old bag that I picked up at an army surplus store. I alwasy get strange looks whien I sit down in a coffee shop and instead of pulling out a tattered note book, I pull out a laptop.

Recently while on a train, I had my laptop, iPod, and digital camera sitting out on my lap. Carrying $2500+ used to make me nervous, although I've gotten used to it now.

Let's meet and talk.

[bcrowell]

I'd really like to help you out with this. Could we get together in person to discuss it? Please reply to this post with the time and place you want to meet, and when you come, make sure to bring all your expensive gear. I'd prefer a time late at night, and someplace out of the way and quiet. Maybe an alley?

Re:Feelings

[platypibri]

My solution was simple, I grew up to be a huge scary man. It's gotten me out of a lot of tight spots.

Re:Well, in a perfect world.

[Nasarius]

For the last time, no you don't.

Paranoid

[Sinful_Shirts]

Personally I think you're being paranoid. Maybe you could get a stun gun or something? Or wear a shirt that says "Guns don't kill people, I kill people" That should scare the muggers away.

Re:Feelings

[Anonymous Coward]

Four words: What about my pr0n?

Re:off-site backups --not just for corporations

[bombadillo]

"I was working at a convenience store a few years ago, and got held up at gun point while developing on my powerbook

Damn, is the job market really that bad?

How to not get mugged in the 21st century

[ejaw5]

Replace the equipment you currently own, and/or gut out old technology and replace with new stuff:

Laptop: Don't stroll the streets with a fancy fangled widescreen ub3r1337 laptop, but instead a tough-built IBM Thinkpad 286-DX. The integrated TrackBall is so easy to use you'll wonder why you've used mice, eraserheads and touchpads for so long!

Instead of iPod, get a $20 Portable Cassette Player..you know..the analog audio type. Each tape can hold 90 minutes of music, which in todays terminology is about the equivalent of 22.5 songs or 112.5MB. (4mins/song, each song 5MB). Plus Cassette has NO DRM, and can store formats of CD/MP3/OGG/ACC/record/8Track in high quality stereo!

Cell Phone: The new phones with camera, MIDI Synthesizer, tv screen, QUERTY keyboard all get in the way of its primary function..get just what you need with a large cell phone from the 80's. With all the EMF generated by this analog phone, no crook would be caught stealing one of these!

PDA: Who needs a embedded computer that needs batteries to run when you can tote around a convienent compact notepad and pencil/pen? Your paper notepad can be backed up at any Kinko's shops or any other place with a copy machine! No more having to sync with PIM software.

Re:Some ideas

[StupidKatz]

We're talking robbery, no rape here.

I see your point, Sir. The next time I see someone coming at me in a threatening manner, I'll look for the placard that says "Robbery, Not Rape".

Thanks for the tip!

Re:Carry a gun

[brian728s]

When you outgun lawyers, only gunners will have laws.

Re:Here is what you do

[Anonymous Coward]

3. Find the dirtiest, nastiest bag you can to put your stuff in

Funny, that's what I always wind up doing when I'm drunk!

Excuuuuuse Meeeee

[Anonymous Coward]

Steve Martin would suggest a staged program
leading through more and more smelly bodily
functions. Muggers may not want a laptop that
smells THAT bad.

Re:avoid the problem

[maskedbishounen]

- grow 14 inches

I keep getting e-mails about something like that, but I don't really see what it has to do with self-defense....

Re:Feelings

[!3ren]

Thanks for the Info, Mr. Banner!
Now where can I find some extra gamma rays...

Re:Stop caring...

[Anonymous Coward]

Life is too short...

I think this is what he's trying to prevent.

Re:its all about the accessories

[Stradenko]

because something that looks like it holds a gun is a less attractive target for criminal types ...

One way to solve it....

[Pikhq]

Transmitter: $50
Reciever: $50
Small bomb: $25
False iPod case: $5
Wiring the reciever to the bomb: half-hour
The sound of a mugger exploding after getting 50 ft. away: Priceless

Re:Feelings

[cshark]

I had a mugging problem when I was in San Francisco. Got mugged twice before I realized that muggers are very predictable. They like their targets to be predictable as well. I found that wearing a dirty shrunken wool jacket I got from goodwill, carrying extra bags, and yelling at people that wearen't there was a great way to avoid getting mugged.

You need to...

[slashname3]

Carry a +5 long sword, and good +2 dagger. Look them right in the eye, hold up a pair of dice and say "You felling lucky punk?".

Re:its all about the accessories

[Jodka]

"Make sure you "rough up" the bag a bit ahead of time (just throw it around against some rocks or something, or the pavement)."

Remember to remove the laptop first.

Re:Carry a gun

[dogfart]

You do realise that assault with a deadly weapon is frowned upon in civilised society, don't you?

Most of us live in the USA. That might explain it. Haven't lived in a "civilised" society yet.

Leave your iPod at home

[lateralus_1024]

voila!! Playa' [google.com]

Guns... Lots of Guns...

[Randseed]

A 9mm compact with loaded eight round clip. Maybe an MP5 slung around my shoulder if it's the deep inner city.

Re:An universal truth

[tktk]

Don't glance around. Strut.

And have "Staying Alive" playing in the background.

Re:Not a problem here

[Telex4]

The UK has enacted a total gun ban, and consequently, violent crime rates have gone up.

Aside from the general nuttiness of the rest of your post, this sentence really caught my attention.

Very few guns have been legal in the UK for a long time. The most recent change I can remember in my lifetime was just to cut down on light handarms that "hobbyists" use and have to keep in ranges. You imply that relatively recently we went from having lots of guns to not having very many, and that there is a parallel increase in violent crimes.

Not only has this phantom increase in violent crimes not occurred over the timescale that guns have been banned, but it's such a long time any link would be pretty difficult to make. Better reasons for increases in violent crime include such things as farcical "drug wars", real wars (afghanistan & iraq, for example) and a lack of attention on the problem.

Re:No. Here's the perfect gadget bag:

[Wyatt Earp]

/. has said before that it's against security through obscurity though. Security tools should be open for all to see and trouble shoot.

That plan won't fly here.

Re:Look Alert

[workingstiff]

Except maybe police and security personnel, who are notorious about that sort of thing.

Or those nice smelling individuals with the longer hair. I forget what they're called, personally, womes or something...

Re:Carry a gun

[Mod Me God Too]

Not to mention that this guy is in London, where you can't get a 'carry concealed weapon permit' or whatever. Of course, you could get a Licence to carry a shotgun provided you carry it in full view and not ready to fire.

Yeah, right. In the UK posession of any gun is prohibited unless you are a sports shooter (and the caliber is very seriously limited) or you are a farmer (in which case you need a massive piece of land called a farm, impossible to find in London unless you lay a claim to Hyde Park or Clapham Common).

Don't use the white iPod earphones

[Lt.Hawkins]

I've read somewhere that they're very distinctive, and you're more likely to be targetted. Switch 'em out to something black, or behind-the-head headphones or something.

Re:How to not get mugged in the 21st century

[CaptainCaveman_2002]

I sure hope you're using a Dvorak or other not common keyboard type... I just hate to picture somebody using a regular keyboard, yet still managing to go out of their way to mistype "qwerty" :-) --- Emoticon added for humor impaired.

Re:Look Alert

[shokk]

When you're afraid of your iPod being lifted, it gives a whole new meaning to the idea of "music piracy."

Re:Not a problem here

[FuzzyBad-Mofo]

I'm filling the sucker full of lead.

Hey, that's your choice and I respect you for it. Personally, I'd just twist their head off.

Re:its all about the accessories

[PsiPsiStar]

Yes, I would also reccomend smudging your face with dirt, not shaving, and mumbling incoherantly to yourself. All these things help to further the image that you do not have anything of value worth robbing.

Re:A gun? LONDON

[bani]

in that case i suggest carrying around a loaded football fan with you at all times.

Re:May not be for you, but...

[node 3]

I keep a little portable pouch of huggies in the front (cause they're damn useful anyway), just in case I get mugged

I can see how the huggies would be useful, but don't you need to put them on *before* some guy sticks a gun in your face?

Re:Feelings

[baxissimo]

I love the fact that the top hit in that google link you posted is a story about a time delay lock COMPLETELY FAILING TO DETER A CRIMINAL. :-)

Re:its all about the accessories

[whereiswaldo]

"Make sure you "rough up" the bag a bit ahead of time (just throw it around against some rocks or something, or the pavement)."

Remember to remove the laptop first.

Yes, and remember folks... RAM DISK is not an installation procedure!

Re:Carry a gun

[Anonymous Coward]

God bless Texas...

Re:Feelings

[Anonymous Coward]

This great advice from a guy who has been both shot and knifed...

Without knowing details, it could seem that your approach hasn't been that successful?

Re:Feelings

[baxissimo]

So were you shot and stabbed by muggers? If so, then remind again me why we should listen to you about how to avoid being mugged?

Or is it a "don't make the same mistakes I made, sonny" kind of a thing?

Re:Here is what you do

[AvantLegion]

2. Where cloths multiple times

Where cloths?

There cloths!

Re:Carry a gun

[The Dark P]

You'd be surprised

Ken's always looking for a new way to get rid of the pigeons. If he can't starve them, he'll bring in poison, birds of prey...

Re:Feelings

[identity0]

Bah, that's too hard for most geeks. Just do what I did: go to a tanning salon until your skin turns very, very dark.

Of course, now the cops hassle me every time I'm out in my Mercedes...

Re:pretty simple really

[Ageless]

I don't know about that. You kick a 6 year old in the throat as he's coming towards you he's gonna drop pretty hard. Then you draw a moustache on him with the marker.

And maybe some funny eyebrows.

Re:Feelings

[Directrix1]

What if he was cradling a gun in his hands, mumbling, "Myyy preeeciousss" while he was walking around. I bet he wouldn't get mugged then.

Re:Feelings

[3l1za]

I had a mugging problem when I was in San Francisco. ... I found that wearing a dirty shrunken wool jacket I got from goodwill, carrying extra bags, and yelling at people that wearen't there was a great way to avoid getting mugged

In other words, you just tried to fit in.

Geographical Advice

[awol]

Don't go south of the river. Don't go outside zone 1. If you must go outside zone one, don't take more than you can sprint with

Re:How to not get mugged in the 21st century

[Anonymous Coward]

...some way to say my data to that

There's a device you can get, called a "microphone".

Re:Get non-descript containers

[SEWilco]

metal laptop case. If worse comes to worse, you can swing the thing at a mugger's head

"The dummy brought a briefcase to a knife fight. Lucky me, it was metal and the blood was easy to wipe off."

NRA Sticker

[Anonymous Coward]

Nothing works better to protect valulables than a well placed NRA Sticker on your laptop bag.

Re:Carry a gun

[Kethinov]

Re:Carry a gun (Score:3, Insightful)
by kahei (466208)
[snip]
Yes, it was flamebait, mod me down... yet there is wisdom in my words I tell you...

Behind a two way mirror, a Zookeeper brings today's visitors to see the Slashdot exhibit.

Zookeeper: "You see children, the alpha male Slashdot specimen ensures that he will be moderated up by using reverse psychology and asking to be moderated down."
Child: "Why would he want to do that?"
Zookeeper: "Highly moderated comments are often regarded as the correct opinion or in some cases irrefutable fact."
Child: "Why doesn't he just ask to be moderated up?"
Zookeeper: "Before a moderator will use their influence to bestow such an honor on a comment, he/she must be convinced. Moderators are usually skeptical of everything. After watching the poster/moderator behavior for many years, we've observed that this reverse psychology is often very persuasive."
Child: "Their behavior is confusing!"
Zookeeper: "It's not unlike guild psychology and social acceptance rituals employed by the specimens in the Everquest exhibit. This way please..."

Re:No. Here's the perfect gadget bag:

[Anonymous Coward]

As a man who's carried a diaper bag before, I would think it highly odd that a person would carry such a bag without a small child nearby. Presumably a mugger, along with the rest of society, would find it unusual also. But if you think it'll deter muggers, go ahead. For extra effect, peek inside the bag every once in a while and say, "Don't worry, honey, it'll just be a bit longer and I can let you out", that would deter a mugger.

An Idea

[limekiller4]

Remove the tape from the middle of your glasses.

Re:Feelings

[Nahor]

I'm usually on campus when I'm moving my gear around - so I just look like another student. Who wants to steal my books anyway?

Could you provide a picture of you and what campus you go to, please?

Re:Feelings

[AlaskanUnderachiever]

A .32 with that sort of load? I can imagine being able to put down a man with that. If he also happened to be strapped down to a table. . .and of weak constitution. . .and maybe anemic. . .oh and I'd have to have a few speed loaders for when I used up the first cylinder. . .

Seriously, there is a damn fine reason why you'll never see anyone serious about self defense with such an anemic load. They don't WORK. I was in a robbery back in '99 and I was shot in the HEAD and lower back with a pretty much identical loadout. Guess what? I got up, took the gun away from the bastard and smacked him with it. A .32 no matter what you're loading into it just doesn't have stopping power (unless you throw the empty gun in which case even Superman will duck).

BO?

[emilng]

Are you sure it's not the BO they're avoiding?

;)

I do this.

[NarrMaster]

I constantly look everywhere while I walk. I started doing this when I realized I get really bored. Keeps my occupied. The sneakiness is really funny too. I see everyone before they see me. I've walked past someone who was "in" the door of an elevator, pushed my button, they turned around, saw me, and nearly had a heart attack. They said "Where the fuck did you come from!"
What's weird is that I can't really sneak up on someone when I want too... It only happens when I'm not actively trying.

Re:its all about the accessories

[nick_davison]

Don't forget "smell of urine".

Oh, come on! Three days at a lan party, you don't want to miss the CS finals, everyone's done it!

Haven't they?... Anyone?...

Re:Carry a gun

[raygundan]

I think he's more likely to be beaten to death by his english teachers.

Biker garb.

[Anonymous Coward]

I found that wearing a dirty shrunken wool jacket I got from goodwill, carrying extra bags, and yelling at people that wearen't there was a great way to avoid getting mugged.

I found that dressing like a biker scumbag, getting some tatoos, growing a goatee and copping an attitude was a great way to avoid being mugged because most people won't mess around with a biker.... except other bikers. Then the real bikers started picking on me and beat me up just because they thought it was fun to do. However, they didn't mug me.

Re:Feelings

[operagost]

The fellow hobbled off with one of my knives stuck in his leg.

Fixed that for you.

Re:Feelings

[XryanX]

I think you missed the joke.

Re:Feelings

[supermarsupial]

In related news, the number of muggings attributed to victims wearing e-Vests have now overtaken those using iPods. When interviewed, a mugger was quoted as saying "Well, I get a higher return with them e-Vests. I use the included cables to tie up my victim, their PDA to take over the identity, the digicam to take pictures of the geek and their laptop to upload their photos to my blog. If I'm lucky, an iPod will be hidden somewhere as well; I got over 5,000 songs one time and 10 hours of free porn. Man, that dude was into some nasty shit. Oh, and don't forget the bottled mineral water. That's a bonus."

Re:Carry a gun

[secolactico]

My sensei also said that another instructor he knew tried to take down a mugger who had a knife and he ended up dead with multiple stab wounds.

Did one of his students swear revenge and tracked down the killer and challenged him to a duel?

I mean... I always assumed it was an unwritten rule of martial arts that when somebody kills your master you have to swear revenge on his grave.

(yes, I'm going to hell)

Re:No. Here's the perfect gadget bag:

[moosesocks]

What you want to do is to carry all your gadgets in a diaper bag. Yes, I'm serious. This is a time-tested technique. Nobody wants to steal a baby-blue or pink cute little bag full of shit.

Not only will muggers avoid you, so will the chicks!

Re:Feelings

[Anonymous Coward]

Personally, I prefer my SIG P229. And I don't mind if they run off with one of my bullets.

Re:A summary (and what I do)

[Maxwell'sSilverLART]

Hint: in most places, killing someone in self-defense is only legal if you had good reason to believe that your own life was in danger.

Hint: in most places, having a gun pointed at you is good reason to believe that your life is in danger.

Re:Carry a gun

[timmi]

of course my Sensi told me to kinda lob the wallet one way, and start running the other...

Re:You need to...

[moosesocks]

Make sure it's a D4

No dice are more deadly than a handful of D4s. Throw em' on the ground and you can't walk away barefooted.

Re:Feelings

[Demogoblin]

In the UK, you are not allowed to own a gun, let alone carry one. Not even the cops carry fireamrs.

HALT! Or I'll be forced to yell HALT again, but louder!

What's the big deal?

[Breakerofthings]

I'm about 6', 250 lbs.

I've only been 'mugged' once; chased the guy for 3 miles, opened a can of whoop-ass, and performed a gen-yoo-wine citizen's arrest. (the 5-Oh actually charged the guy with resisting arrest for running from me :)

So my advice is, be large, shave your head, and try to look mean :)

Re:Carry a gun

[fucksl4shd0t]

Throw the wallet on the ground. When he goes to pick it up, you kick him in the forehead. He'll be stunned and knocked on his ass.

I've got two particular approaches in mind. :)

The Dan Akroyd approach: *take out wallet and drop it* "I'm sorry, let me get that for you" *bend over and hit your head on the mugger's head, who is also bending over for it* "Ouch! I'm sorry, I didn't see you" *bend over again and trip over the air or something, knocking into the mugger* "Oops, I didn't see you there" etc.

The Crocodile Dundee approach, of course:

"That's not a knife. This is a knife."

Re:Feelings

[paganizer]

Well, you could just join your local SCA [sca.org] group, and always go around in period attire. they will think you are crazy, and avoid you, plus it makes it less silly looking to carry a big blade, mace, battleaxe, morning star, whatever.

I'm not certain what London laws are concerning carrying swords; don't you have to be in one of the guilds or something to get away with it? but if that's an option.....

Re:Get non-descript containers

[Thomas Shaddack]

Besides, a guy carrying a metal case (briefcase type) is probably less likely to get mugged than a guy carrying a leather laptop case.

You may improve it by putting a "Radioactive Material" or "Biohazard" sticker on the metal briefcase. A tested side effect is having more space around you in public transportation.

Re:Feelings

[CCIEwannabe]

I have a friend that real life role plays. He was dressed up in his medieval armor and cloak garb waiting at a train station one day. A mugger came up to him with a 4 inch knife and said "give me your wallet". My mate stared him in the face and moved his cloak to reveal a 30 inch long sword. "I see your 4 and raise you 26". Should have seen him run.

Re:Let's meet and talk.

[khallow]

I see you haven't been mugged by eight astronomers before. Let's just say that these scoundrels go where the sky's clearest and there aren't a lot of witnesses around.

Geeks aren't 'players'

[MarcQuadra]

...they don't treat relationships like games...

Damn straight, I treat mine like SCIENCE EXPERIMENTS.

I wonder how she'll react if I eat the spider instead of smiting it?

Today I'll find out why she doesn't put some clothing items into the dryer.

I wonder what happens if I slip a Jolly Rancher in there while I'm eating her out, will she even notice?

Re:Feelings

[MobileC]

" a motorcycle and a visible knife clipped to my pocket."

How big is this pocket?

Re:Feelings

[Mhtsos]

With practice you can draw a katana pretty quick
With the Quick draw feat you can drow any weapon as a free action!

Re:Feelings

[Lakers]

good god man, men with no guns? that's like a geek without mountain dew. It's just unnatural!

Martial Arts...

[dallask]

Im a black belt in Tukong Musel TyKuanDo, and Fifth Do in Akido... I know 3 weapons very well, knife and club defense, and carry a 5.5 ft chain with an 3 oz steal ball at the end... when used right it forms a forcefield of spinning death arround me.

Of course, if this is too much movement for you, you can always download Kung Fu into your brain :)

Re:Look Alert

[moonbender]

Arms actively working to balance your body? Is that supposed to be a sign of confidence? Because it sure sounds more like a sign of a walking disability.

Re:Is your friend Australian?

[alaric_uk]

Obligatory Simpsons quote:

"Bart: Um, that's a spoon.
Australian guy: Ah, I can see you've played knifey-spoony before!"

Re:No. Here's the perfect gadget bag:

[Chris Burke]

Slashdot has never had, nor will it ever need, an article on "How to Avoid Women".

Re:Feelings

[macmastery]

Sorry your show on MTV got cancelled.

Re:wait a minute...

[Anonymous Coward]

you go outside?
in LONDON???

Re:Feelings

[gweihir]

The fellow ran off with one of my knives stuck in his leg. Bummer. I liked that knife.

Maybe he wanted to steal the knive?

Re:Feelings

[Sj0]

AAAAAHHHHH! Urban Leigons! Run away!! RUN AWAY!!! The countless armies of the city approach to smite us all with their might!!!

(Urban legends, dude. :) )