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What's the Worst Movie You've Ever Seen? 1675

Posted by Cliff
from the trash-of-the-box-office dept.
prostoalex asks: "A recent Ask Yahoo! article talks about the worst movies ever made and points out this IMDB list of the bottom rankings. The Ask Yahoo! article names Manos The Hands of Fate the worst one, but apparently the IMDB table changed since then to include The Wild World of Batwoman at the top of the list. What would you consider the worst movie ever made? Perhaps anything listed here would also make the list?"
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What's the Worst Movie You've Ever Seen?

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  • by Anonymous Coward on Saturday August 14, 2004 @01:51PM (#9968090)
    ....or my mom will shoot.
  • That's easy (Score:1, Interesting)

    by ParticleMan911 (688473) on Saturday August 14, 2004 @01:53PM (#9968106) Homepage
    "Hackers"
  • Starship Troopers (Score:2, Interesting)

    by Schreckgestalt (692027) on Saturday August 14, 2004 @01:54PM (#9968118)
    Worst movie ever. True.
  • Darkest Knight (Score:4, Interesting)

    by Jacer (574383) on Saturday August 14, 2004 @01:54PM (#9968122) Homepage
    My room mates and I decided to rent it one knight based soley on the Dragons on the box. It turned out to remind me of a student film by some drop out. Every time the hero entered, EVERY time, they played the same fanfare. To top it off, there weren't any dragons, just a portal with a humanoid demon-looking thing trying to step through. Bad as it is, I still recommend everyone try and watch it. Until you see it, your meter for bad, nay all movies isn't properly calibrated. As a side note, they have two sequals of which I intend to watch.
  • Eyes Wide Shut (Score:3, Interesting)

    by Anonymous Coward on Saturday August 14, 2004 @01:57PM (#9968156)
    Eyes Wide Shut has to be the worst movie I've ever seen. The music was terrible like someone was just trying to annoy you by randomly hitting the high pitch keys of a piano. It had so much nudity and was such a stupid story. It wasn't a porn, it wasn't a movie, it was floating somewhere in the middle that made no sense and wasted everyones time who watched it.

    The movie was so bad I wonder if it contributed to Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman's divorce. It had to as after being in that movie I probably couldn't face anyone I was in the movie with. It was that bad!
  • MST3K (Score:3, Interesting)

    by AndyBusch (160585) on Saturday August 14, 2004 @02:01PM (#9968199)
    I've always had a slightly hard time swallowing having MST3K bashed movies on the list. Odds are, very few people have seen Manos outside of that context, and it changes the experience of the film. Sure, it's bad, but it wouldn't have enough votes to be found bad without someone digging it up to show people.
  • by Tsar (536185) on Saturday August 14, 2004 @02:03PM (#9968220) Homepage Journal
    ...The only thing worse than The Life of David Gale ever to make it out of the editing room. All these movies beg the questions: At what point do they first realize it and say "It's too late to go back now?" Is it ever really too late? And if not, what's the most expensive movie ever made that didn't get distributed because it was Just That Bad?
  • money.. (Score:2, Interesting)

    by t_allardyce (48447) on Saturday August 14, 2004 @02:06PM (#9968264) Journal
    Note how many are made very recently vs the top box-office returns of the same time scale.. ie the trend is films are getting worse, but making more money.

    i thought spiderman 2 sucked allot (now im gonna get it) allot of pointless depressing character insight that really made you want to scream at the screen "for fucks sake, you could have made that pizza delivery on time if you had become spiderman quicker and not screwed around with that mop!" and "oh for crying out loud, tell her!" in the end, not only does he tell her (i thought that was the whole problem anyway?) but he somehow chose to both save lives and be with her?!?! so basically you have a premise, and instead of finding a solution you just say, oh ok, fuck it, lets just do that anyway im sure it will be ok. Then theres that octo-guy. "yes you see the arms are prevented from taking over by *this* *little* *chip* here on the back of my neck, yes just *here*, lets just *hope* nothing happens to that!!" but he just goes ahead and runs his experiment in the middle of the city anyway (because you just cant get the labour outside new york). Actually i missed the first film so i cant really comment on all of it and not _everything_ sucked, i liked the train sequence where even though he was a tough superhero there were still things that even he found hard.. all the other bits just served to make you really irritated because they wernt really problems.

  • THX1138 (Score:1, Interesting)

    by Anonymous Coward on Saturday August 14, 2004 @02:08PM (#9968286)

    Without a doubt.... THX1138

    Not only real cheezy with those VW kit cars, but just plain stupid and boring to boot.

    And I saw it in the theaters when it was first released, what a waste of time and money.

    Flame away kiddies, it still sucks big!

  • by dknight (202308) <damen@knigh t s p e e d .com> on Saturday August 14, 2004 @02:09PM (#9968309) Homepage Journal
    Let me start out saying that I am a Jackie Chan nut, and I DO own this DVD. Having said that... The subtitles are misspelled, make no sense, and frequently have words that are obviously made up. Parts of women randomly turn into food... and there's a song and dance number by a pair of chinese guys in black leather/spandex biker outfits... Jackie Chan even dresses up as various street fighter characters(including chun li) and fights at one point. Aside from some impressive fight scenes, this is in my opinion the worst movie of all time... Even worse than Manos.
  • by LGagnon (762015) on Saturday August 14, 2004 @02:11PM (#9968333)
    Many "worst movies of all time" lists tend to not include the absolute worst ones ever made. Many obscure poorly done films are overlooked, and instead these lists will only put in the bad films that will be remembered. In fact, we could sum most of these lists up to be really lists of 3 things: 1) most disappointing hyped-up films, 2) most memorable bad films, and 3) worst recent films.

    That said, IMDb does an ok job of giving the bad obscure films their due. :)
  • by dustman (34626) <.ten.cltt. .ta. .yraeld.> on Saturday August 14, 2004 @02:11PM (#9968341)
    There are really bad movies, I've seen some of them on MST3K, etc...

    But, you can look at almost all film student projects, etc, and say, god that's horrible.

    A different measure, is, "what's the worst movie you've ever paid to see".

    "The 13th Warrior", and "John Carpenter's Ghosts of Mars" are the worst movies I have ever paid money to watch.

  • by Anonymous Coward on Saturday August 14, 2004 @02:27PM (#9968512)
    If dreamcatcher meets your standard for walking out on a movie I would just say home because the number of really great movies each year are far and few between.

    They botched the ending compared to the book but; you wouldn't know that would you?

  • Re:Legend (Score:1, Interesting)

    by Anonymous Coward on Saturday August 14, 2004 @02:48PM (#9968719)
    I agree that it is a bad movie but the worst? Naw..

    Obviously he was trying to something artsie with the petals and scenery. It's different. You've got something against pointy ears?

    The sing-song dialogue is interesting to listen to. From the perspective of a kid, not a bad movie. One of the best devils I've ever seen in a movie.

  • by peeping_Thomist (66678) * on Saturday August 14, 2004 @02:50PM (#9968731)
    Stuart Saves His Family

    This was actually a pretty good movie, but it was more serious than people who saw it expected it to be. Al Franken is heavy into the world of recovering substance abusers, and he was using this movie to work out some of his own problems. Some people like that notion of art as self-revelation, and others don't. But that doesn't make it a bad movie.
  • No, Cabin Boy (Score:3, Interesting)

    by cryptochrome (303529) on Saturday August 14, 2004 @03:14PM (#9968946) Journal
    What a putrid pile of filth. I thought, "Gee, it must be at least unintentionally funny." I was wrong.

    Starring Chris Elliot, in case you've never heard of it.
  • by k98sven (324383) on Saturday August 14, 2004 @03:44PM (#9969157) Journal
    Obligatory Simpsons quote:
    "What the heck was that?"
    -Bart Simpson, Milhouse and Nelson leaving a movie theatre billed "The Naked Lunch".

    Seriously though.. You kind of have to take the context into account- It's based on a William Burroughs book. He was pretty doped-up most of the time, and his books reflect it.
    (It's not entirely based on the book, but also on the life of Burroughs. He did shoot his wife, you know.)

    Here's a start for interpretation:
    Writing = using drugs,
    different typewriters = different drugs.

    Of course, it's still a matter of taste. Some people like more literal stuff, nothing wrong with that.
  • Re:Blah... (Score:3, Interesting)

    by Hogwash McFly (678207) on Saturday August 14, 2004 @03:45PM (#9969165)
    Does anyone else actually go out of their way to watch awful movies? My housemate and I ordered Battlefield Earth when we were with Screen Select (A UK based Netflix alternative). Neither of us had watched it before and we wanted to see why it was so spectacularly panned that we actually paid to watch it. Madness you say? Well, I have to state right now that watching Battlefield Earth was more enjoyable than many middle of the road summer flicks I have seen because it was so terrible that it became really hilarious.

    It's as though when you reach the extreme opposite end of the scale you loop back to the other end of 'Unforgettable, widely known classics'. Also, while watching a stinker can be amusing, it can also make you appreciate truly great movies that much more.

    I am planning to watch Gigli as soon as I can based on this principle.
  • by BoneFlower (107640) <george.worroll@g[ ]l.com ['mai' in gap]> on Saturday August 14, 2004 @03:52PM (#9969210) Journal
    I don't think Rocky Horror should qualify as "so bad its good"... that was the whole damned point, so succeeding on that front as well as it did, shows it is actually an incredibly good piece of filmmaking prowess. It filled its intended role better than almost any other movie.
  • Re:Fahrenheit 9/11 (Score:3, Interesting)

    by peachpuff (638856) on Saturday August 14, 2004 @04:08PM (#9969304)

    It's easy to spot people who are criticizing that movie without having seen it. They regurgitate some talking points without adding anything personal. That would be credible if the talking points were a knock-down ironclad rebuttal, but they always seem to miss the forest for the trees. To anyone who's actually seen the movie, they sound like: "Aha! Moore shows Bush hugging the Saudi ambassador and implies that it happened in the Oval Office. In fact, it happened in Saudi Arabia." Most of it is beside the point and "debunks" things that I neither believed nor thought that the film was trying to make me believe.

    I don't buy Moore's conspiracy theories, but the film has a lot more to offer. The re-creation of the attacks is the most propagandistic part of the film, but it's also the best and the least anti-Bush. If you haven't seen the movie, watch it for that--and for the interviews. Moore spends a surprising amount of time with his own mouth closed.

  • by Anonymous Coward on Saturday August 14, 2004 @04:15PM (#9969366)
    Sorry to disappoint you, but the 5th Element is actually on my top 25 list. Since at least one person (me) considers it one of the best movies of all time, it automatically fails the "univerally considered the worst movie of all time" test.

    In my opinion, Starship Troopers (1997; 6.6) is definitely not great, and it's really not even very good; however, it is slightly better than average, and it is far from being a bad movie. It's on my "middle shelf" of DVDs. Consider this a rejection of your claim that it's one of the worst movies ever.

    By the way, here are my top 25 movies (with year, IMDB score and rank). Note that I personally do not differentate them; they're all at least 4.5 out of 5 stars in my book.

    • Contact (1997; 7.3; n/a)
    • Dead Poets Society (1989; 7.7; n/a)
    • Field of Dreams (1989; 7.7; n/a)
    • the Fifth Element (1997; 7.1; n/a)
    • Forrest Gump (1994; 8.1; #115)
    • Gladiator (2000; 8.0; #169)
    • Hudson Hawk (1991; 5.1; n/a)
    • Jerry Maguire (1996; 7.3; n/a)
    • the Last of the Mohicans (1992; 7.5; n/a)
    • Mars Attacks! (1996; 6.1; n/a)
    • the Matrix (1999; 8.5; #34)
    • Memento (2000; 8.7; #19)
    • the Nightmare Before Christmas (1993; 7.8; n/a)
    • Office Space (1999; 7.6; n/a)
    • Pirates of the Carribean (2003; 8.1; #188)
    • the Princess Bride (1987; 8.2; #101)
    • the Shawshank Redemption (1994; 9.0; #2)
    • Sneakers (1992; 7.0; n/a)
    • Star Wars: A New Hope (1977; 8.8; #10)
    • Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back (1980; 8.7; #13)
    • Terminator 2 (1991; 8.1; #111)
    • Toy Story 2 (1999; 8.1; #110)
    • Toys (1992; 4.6; n/a)
    • True Lies (1994; 7.0; n/a)
    • the Usual Suspects (1995; 8.7; #18)

    Note: The mean score on IMDB is currently 6.8. The only movies in my top 25 that are below the IMDB mean are misunderstood comedies with interesting social commentary: Hudson Hawk (42% rated it 7 or better), Mars Attacks! (51% rated it 7 or better) and Toys (30% rated it 7 or better).

    Also note: I have about 140 other DVDs, including at least 20 more of the IMDB top 250 (* I don't have star wars on DVD yet). My "top shelf" of DVDs also includes: Almost Famous, American Beauty, Apocalypse Now, Backdraft, Blade Runner, Braveheart, Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon, Curse of the Jade Scorpion, Good Will Hunting, LA Confidential, Magnolia, Mission Impossible, O Brother where art thou?, Pulp Fiction, Rounders, Saving Private Ryan, Shakespeare in Love, Shrek, the Spanish Prisoner, Titanic and Unforgiven.

    p.s. I watched Alien (good) and Aliens (good) two weeks ago, Alien 3 (bad) and Alien 4 (bad) last weekend, then City Slickers (decent) last night. I'll probably watch Hook, a League of their Own or Medicine Man tonight, depending on my mood.

  • by riscthis (597073) on Saturday August 14, 2004 @04:30PM (#9969476)
    Absolutely -- Alien Resurrection was a terrible movie. Unfortunately I own it on DVD, but only as it's part of the Alien Quadrilogy box set :/

    It can stay in the box.

    On a side note, if you haven't seen the Alien 3 Special Edition version released last year, it's well worth seeing as it's much closer to the director's original version than the cut the studio orginally released, and really a much better film for it.
  • by adzoox (615327) on Saturday August 14, 2004 @05:25PM (#9969852) Journal
    We're talking about what you hate personally. It's what you hate that we all hate equally.

    I think the consensus here is definitely on:

    Battlefield Earth

    Most of the movies in the IMDB Bottom 100 are bad movies - on purpose. Some of those movies in the list are B Movies and some never saw nationwide release ... I hardly see how they can even be included.

    A very obvious omission - one that I didn't see by scrolling through all of this quickly and that i couldn't spot on the bottom 100 is:

    Heman: Masters Of The Universe (Live Action)

  • by MSZ (26307) on Saturday August 14, 2004 @05:34PM (#9969911)
    The magnificent works of Ed Wood [imdb.com], where are they? Even his masterpiece [imdb.com] is missing!
  • by mabu (178417) * on Saturday August 14, 2004 @05:56PM (#9970059)
    I couldn't agree with you more!

    If you're going to judge movies, you need to put them in proper context. There are tons of really bad movies, some of which are intentionally bad, or which boldly capitalize on tired characters, concepts and previously successful themes. But when you have ten times the raw material and resources of others, a script from one of the world's best screenwriters, and you botch it up this bad, someone should take a bat to your knees.

    In the grand scheme of things, Aritificial Intelligence is easily the worst movie ever created.

    I can forgive a grass roots crew with a dream but no clue. But you can't forgive Steven Spielburg and the millions of bucks he threw into this, or not be completely confounded as to why someone didn't question the butchering he gave to what was a promising script.

    Who the hell was this movie for? No one knows really. It was the most perverse, illogical, pathetic and disappointing thing ever projected onto a screen.

    And then he followed that pile of trash with another pile of trash called "Minority Report" whose listing of continuity errors would be ten times the size of the original script!

    Spielburg's career is over. He needs to do everyone a favor and look into something else to do with his time, because his work is a disgrace to the good filmmakers out there that can't get any resources.
  • by Anonymous Coward on Saturday August 14, 2004 @06:09PM (#9970155)
    Actually, LotR movies are 3 of the greatest movies ever made. I've read the books (almost) 5 times now since I was 15 and I feel they really did capture what Tolkien wrote down. I'm sorry you didn't see this but maybe you were underwhelmed by all the fanboys out there praising it so much.

    But some people refuse to like something no matter what. If others like it, they have to be "above it all to show how cool they think they are". It's weird.

    But hey, maybe you just didnt like it.
  • by Pieroxy (222434) on Saturday August 14, 2004 @06:26PM (#9970270) Homepage
    Agreed, I vote for Highlander II without a doubt.

    I loved the first one so much that I blindly ran in the theaters to see the second one. I have never regretted my $5 (at the time) more than that. Truly pathetic.
  • by Weirdofreak (769987) <weirdofreak@gmail.com> on Saturday August 14, 2004 @06:37PM (#9970318)
    Recently, the League of Extraordinary Gentlemen. Or possibly Tomb Raider 2. I also saw the first two Pokemon movies, but I enjoyed them at the time, so I dunno if they count. I don't usually watch movies if I think they're going to suck (TR2 was an exception, my friend invited me), which means that I haven't seen Van Helsing, but if I had, that would replace LEG. Charlies Angels is in a similar situation, but I doubt it sucks quite so much.
  • by Beryllium Sphere(tm) (193358) on Saturday August 14, 2004 @07:06PM (#9970479) Homepage Journal
    The engaging characters of Plan 9 From Outer Space along with the sense of wasted potential you got from Star Trek V, The Banal Frontier.
  • Kipperbang (Score:1, Interesting)

    by Anonymous Coward on Saturday August 14, 2004 @07:17PM (#9970577)
    Bloody horrible movie my father got for us when I was young. http://us.imdb.com/title/tt0084459/
  • by TaxSlave (23295) <lockjaw AT lockjawslair DOT com> on Saturday August 14, 2004 @07:18PM (#9970593) Homepage Journal

    The absolute worst movie I've ever seen was, by far, Horror Planet, aka Inseminoid [imdb.com]. I say this while pointing out that I've seen both Iron Eagle II and Highlander II on the big screen.

    Hey, a friend and I wanted to watch a good Science Fiction movie, and we had access to all the free movies we could watch through the local video store, because our friend managed it. It was just plain bad. Even though aliens were being born from the stomachs of several characters, the real enemy of the movie seemed to be rocks. While looking among the rocks, one of the characters falls on a rock, resulting in depressurization of his spacesuit and death. While this might sound like a cool effect, it really wasn't. Nothing about this movie was cool at all.

    Oh yeah. Sheena is on cable right now, and I'm too lazy to get up and change the channel, so you know Horror Planet had to be bad for me to hate it that much. Sheena is a masterpiece by comparison.

  • by rthille (8526) <web-slashdot AT rangat DOT org> on Saturday August 14, 2004 @07:24PM (#9970626) Homepage Journal
    Worst Movie Ever!

    IMDB Link [imdb.com]

    170 minutes of my life I'll never get back. A confusing pointless parade of cameos of stars which you hopelessly grapple for in hopes that they will be the sign of the start of a story line worth caring about.
  • by Fantastic Lad (198284) on Saturday August 14, 2004 @11:52PM (#9972035)
    Aside from the depressing bleakness of the film, I thought it was pretty darned clever and quite watchable.

    Made for a song, too. Think about it! They only needed the one set! Plus, all the special computer effects were done for free by the effects company so that they could advertise their wares to the film industry. All in all, a very solid film made for almost nothing. Written like a 102 minute twi-light zone, I had no real complaints except intellectual differences which would have made for interesting talk with the writer/director over beer.

    --And it wasn't an alien cube. Just government. I guess you got fed up and didn't finish watching.


    -FL

  • by Aunty Spam (781706) on Sunday August 15, 2004 @12:30AM (#9972204)
    >Some movies are so bad they're good in their own way. My favourite two in this category are: 1. Mom and Dad Save the Planet 2. Voyage of the Rock Aliens. Starring, and I use the term losely, Pia Zadora. How can you not like a movie whose best part, beside the closing credits, is the 'bonus' music video at the beginning, and the reason it's the best part is *because* it has Germaine Jackson in it?
  • Re:Starship Troopers (Score:3, Interesting)

    by bill_mcgonigle (4333) * on Monday August 16, 2004 @02:34AM (#9978191) Homepage Journal
    Yeah, like co-ed showers!

    Back before CGI you could reliably expect at least one good boob scene in most movies aimed at guys, especially teen-aged guys.

    StarShip Troopers was, in a way a bridge film - a film with both CGI and boobs.

    Now it's all CGI. And all-CGI films suck. Somebody should pay attention to this trend.
  • by Anonymous Coward on Monday August 16, 2004 @04:27PM (#9984440)
    Tom Green is a genius. Some random studio comes up to him and says "Tom Green! You is so funny and the kids today are liking you a lot! Here is a blank cheque, make us a movie and we will all share in the riches!"

    Tom, being the cool Canuck that he is, has enough money already. He decided to see if he can make a movie so bad that it will surely be cancelled before it is finished. It's a practical joke. Seriously, the WHOLE THING was a practical joke on the studio, but the studio never caught on! The movie was actually edited, promoted, and released.

    Once you realize that the whole thing was a joke, it's still a horrible movie, but suddenly a lot funnier.

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