How Would You Deal With A Global Bandwidth Crisis?

lopy writes "First Google claimed the internet infrastructure won't scale to provide an acceptable user experience for online video. Then some networking experts predict that a flu pandemic would bring the internet to it's knees and lead to internet rationing. We used to think that bandwidth would always increase as needed, but what would happen if that isn't the case? How would you deal with a global bandwidth shortage? Would you be willing to voluntarily limit your internet usage if necessary? Could you live in a world without cheap and plentiful broadband internet access?"

How would I deal with it?

[JesseL]

I guess I'd have to stop reloading slashdot every 10 seconds.

This is America.

[Anonymous Coward]

We get what we want, and everyone else goes without. Nobody here cares if Nepal is cut off, right? Right.

Re:How would I deal with it?

[Anonymous Coward]

I guess I'd have to stop reloading slashdot every 10 seconds.

And I'd have to stop downloading porn. Oh, the humanity!

United States

[Anonymous Coward]

"Could you live in a world without cheap and plentiful broadband internet access?"

I Live in the United States you insensitive clod!

Well, that's simple...

[thesameguy]

I think the answer is obvious: You just build more tubes.

Stockpile!

[Anonymous Coward]

How Would You Deal With A Global Bandwidth Crisis?

I'd stockpile porn and make a killing selling DVDs to all the geeks in the neighbourhood suffering from withdrawal..

Texting

[benhocking]

Jst rembr 2 spl rite. Evry chr cnts!

I'd tell Al Gore....

[lexsco]

.. You created it, you fix it !!!

Re:How would I deal with it?

[Dr. Eggman]

I guess that would mean I'd have to stop my shoddy-attempt-at-a-web-spider from crawling through the Slashdot links, too.

Whoops, no need. It just crashed again...

Re:How would I deal with it?

[evilviper]

I guess I'd have to stop reloading slashdot every 10 seconds.

Then the terrorists will truly have won...

In case of avian flu pandemic

[fotoguzzi]

I guess IP over carrier pigeon [ietf.org] would be out.

Re:"Global bandwidth crisis" is a crock

[Anthony Baby]

I'm inclined to agree and call bullshit to this. I survived MCI Worldcom, Global Crossing, and Metromedia Fiber among others. I've got boxes of papers from during and after the days when people like Bernie Ebbers and John Sidgmore were screaming that there wasn't enough bandwidth, while people like Gary Winnick were out conning businessmen into cabling deals. Maybe it's post-traumatic stress, but whenever I hear business people make vague blanket statements about there not being enough bandwidth I cringe and hide behind a tree on the off chance I'll get to club Jack Grubman.

Re:"Global bandwidth crisis" is a crock

[inviolet]

1. Deliver a thoughtful and witty reply in a slashdot thread.
2. Illustrate the reply with Yet Another Car Analogy.
3. Bend the car analogy into an angry, frothing rant against SUVs... or rather, against the people who drive them... or rather, against the people who can afford them.
4. ???
5. Hard-on! I mean, profit!

Never underestimate...

[flanktwo]

I would start a company that drives truckloads of hard drives across the country. They didn't say anything about a latency problem...

Re:"Global bandwidth crisis" is a crock

[ikkonoishi]

Actually 50% of them have no dick at all. We call them females.

Obvious Solution

[Anonymous Coward]

Make everyone use Lynx. Starting with Vista users.

As silly as worrying about "road shortage"...

[PMBjornerud]

And just how would you deal with a global road shortage? Imaging not being able to take the car to the supermarket down on the corner! Starvation, my friends.

Seriously, are we predicting the end of human civilization because we have an infinite demand for youtube and P2P? It's a non-issue. Get any major trouble with congestion, and broadband subscribtions would simply fall back to capped bandwidth.

The article seems to ignore the fact of all-we-can-eat subscribtions. And then worries about how we're running amok with it. Duh. Because it's free, stupid.

However, to prevent the imminent destruction of humankind, I propose:

1: That damn dirty pirates only download things they're actually going to watch, instead of attempting to build a local copy of media history. (Est. bandwith savings: 60%)
2: That governments introduce makes it a felony to upload tasteless content on youtube. (Est. bandwith savings: 30%)
3: That the US declares War on Spammers and puts its military to some proper use. (Est. bandwith savings: 20%. And world peace)

Re:How would I deal with it?

[Anonymous Coward]

There's only one thing to do - tie the tubes! That'll fix this problem up.

We can charge a maintenance fee for that. Then we can start charging for untying a tube.
Then we can provide an email alert service that your tube will be tied.
Oooo, we could tie two tubes together...so they can have a private tube. Exciting!

Weeeee! This tube stuff is fun and profitable!

Re:Stockpile!

[Anonymous Coward]

No, the reason why your husband has nearly a terabyte of porn is because he loves you very much. All his single mates have at least five terabytes.

Re:How would I deal with it?

[Anonymous Coward]

Heck if you did that JesseL wouldn't have to stop reloading slashdot.

Say what?

[papa.coen]

You mean, I'll actually have to live my _first_ life? No way!