What is Your Favorite Way to Make Coffee?

markov_chain asks: "For a while I've been making coffee using home-ground whole beans and a standard drip maker. I settled on this method for its simplicity and good taste, even after trying numerous other methods (such as the French press, gravity percolators, and pressure percolators), each coupled with either pre-ground or whole beans. So far, the fresh ground beans are the only factor that made a significant difference in taste. However, when I recently spotted a a site that vaguely extols freshness, I began to wonder how much the freshness of the beans themselves affects the quality. Normally I thought the whole beans would retain the quality far longer, due to less surface area exposed to air, but clearly there still must be a decline; worse yet, it is difficult to gauge that decline since the sellers usually do not advertise the age of the beans. I would now like to pose a few questions. What is your preferred coffee-making method, and how does it compare to other methods you've tried? What are your favorite beans?"

Strong

[eln]

I use 1 teaspoon of water for every tablespoon of ground beans. I use whole beans, but keep an extra tablespoon of ground beans around to start the process because I don't have a grinder. After the first cup, I can grind the beans with my bare hands from the twitch alone.

Simplicity

[Durrok]

1. Open can of whatever was on sale at Meijer
2. Make coffee
3. Pour enough milk/sugar in that I don't taste the coffee
4. Consume

I'm way too tired in the morning to do much else or worry about the freshness of my beans. :p

Jackoffee

[chord.wav]

With a little spurt of Jack Daniel's

Wimps!

[ProppaT]

Real men suck on plugs of grounds. Liquid coffee's for sissies....

Easy way

[coren2000]

I like to push the GO button on the coffee machine at work.

My method

[Profane MuthaFucka]

Just get a jar of Sanka http://www.shopping.com/xDN-food_and_drinks-sanka_ coffee [shopping.com] and make it medium weak. Then, grind up two No-Doz http://www.novartis.com/consumerhealth/OTC/NoDoz.s html [novartis.com] and a Commit Nicotine lozenge http://www.commitlozenge.com/ [commitlozenge.com] and put them in the coffee. Chase it with some Tequila, and that's all you need every morning to get you ready to take on the world. The ENTIRE world.

Re:Fresh ground

[jbrax]

Type "man emacs"

Re:Chemex

[Anonymous Coward]

I suppose if you want to be truly geeked-out you could use a vacuum pump and extraction funnel. I've done that myself to show off

This story is about coffee, not masturbation techniques.

Re:Jackoffee

[canUbeleiveIT]

With a little spurt of Jack Daniel's

I'm a little uncomfortable with the term "spurt," especially if we're talking about something that's going in my coffee.

I'm not sure Freshness is a factor.

[Allnighterking]

Noting that the most expensive coffee in the world is an Indonesian Blend that passes through the digestive track [truthorfiction.com] of a local monkey. I'd hardly call these beans "fresh".

Re:Jackoffee

[Breakfast Pants]

And yet you aren't uncomfortable with the term "Jackoffee". Wow.

Best lightness recipe

[Anonymous Coward]

1) 1 tablespoon of coffee grounds (use ones that have been brewed or percolated) per quart of water. Mix the grounds and water together.
2) You will probably want to use a bag with a larger nozzle (so the grounds can pass through easily).
3) You will also want to shake the mixture before administering.
4) Find a good position. Make sure you are comfortable and can relax. Be sure you can clean up if a problem is to occur.
5) Lubricate your anus. You might want a partner to massage some lubricant inside your anus and rectum. This will help when the nozzle is inserted. You will want your anus to admit the nozzle so that you can relax.
6) As the nozzle is inserted, relax as it passes your sphincter. You might want to take a couple of deep breaths as it passes.
7) Relax, as your partner turns on the flow. Mentally picture yourself receiving it. A good partner will slow the flow if you experience any gripping. You may end up making a mess if you panic. Instead, try to relax, everything will be fine. If cramps come (and they probably will during your first enema) have your partner stop the flow, breath deep, and try massaging your stomach area.
8) If you feel the need to evacuate, ask your partner to stop the flow. Relax, the desire will pass as your colon relaxes.
9) You might feel your stomach expanding. Let it. Try to hold the enema for a few minutes.
10) When it is time to evacuate, take yourself (with the tube still in place) to the lavatory. Wait until you are in a position to evacuate before you remove the tube.
11) After you evacuate, take a deep breath and feel your lightness.

Oh, you wanted coffee to DRINK!!!!
Yeah, I won't drink that

Re:Fresh ground

[CitizenJohnJohn]

Mini Mazzer [coffeegeek.com]. You can always pass it down to your kids.

Oh, hang on, this is Slashdot, there's a prerequisite missing to having kids...

Dad's coffee

[The Fun Guy]

How I did it before I had kids:

1. Open the freezer and take out the 5:1 mixture of Kona mild roast and Kenya AAA dark roast beans, which I stored in an air-tight plastic tub.
2. Measure exactly 1/4 cup of beans into my grinder, add 1 teaspoon of ground chicory, which I stored air-tight but at room temperature.
3. Grind medium fine and pour half into the bleach-free Melita filters in my Braun drip machine.
4. Grind the remainder extra fine and add to the filter.
5. Fill the machine with the filtered water I'd let stand overnight to outgas the chlorine, and start the machine.
6. While coffee is brewing, use a soft-tipped brush to clean out the grinder and put the coffee and chicory away.
7. Pour the coffee into a my very clean mug, reserved just for coffee, just as the pot finishes brewing. Enjoy the appearance, aroma and intense flavor of the first sip, and let the flavor bloom through each subsequent sip.
8. Discard any coffee that's been sitting on the warmer for more than 30 minutes, and make it fresh.
9. Wash pot, filter, lid and mugs by hand with very hot water and a mild Alconox [vwrlabshop.com] solution, to remove residues. Dry with a soft towel and replace, ready for the next pot.

How I do it now, with four kids:

1. If there isn't any cold coffee left from yesterday, open can of Folger's.
2. Put four or five scoops into the paper filter I got in bulk at Costco, in my Braun drip machine.
3. Fill pot with water straight from the tap. Add to machine. Press button.
4. Feed kids while coffee is brewing.
5. Pour coffee into whatever mug's closest, as soon as I get the chance. Drink. Repeat until either pot is empty, or I have to go to work.
6. Leave empty mug, empty pot on counter. Go to work.

Re:Fresh ground

[connect4]

No! Coffee passed through the gastrointestinal tract of the Sumatran civet cat [firebox.com] within the last four hours has the best falvour.