Ask Slashdot: How To Collect Payments From a Multinational Company? 341
An anonymous reader writes "I run a small dev shop focused on web development, based in Europe. For the past six years we've had lots of successful projects with clients from CEE, Western Europe and the U.S. One of our main clients was based in the U.S. We started working for them in 2008, while they were a 'promising start-up' and everything went smoothly until they were bought by a multinational corp. We couldn't be happier to work for such a big player in the market, andwe even managed to get by with huge payment delays (3-4 months on a monthly contract), but now, after more than two years working for them, I have the feeling we're getting left out. We have six-month-old unpaid invoices and we're getting bounced between the E.U. and U.S. departments every time we try to talk to them. What can a small company do to fight a big corporation that's NASDAQ listed and has an army of lawyers? They've been getting a lot of bad press lately so I don't think that will scare them either."
Six helpful options (Score:0, Funny)
I want to make it clear that I am not a lawyer, so please don't construe this advice as creating an attorney-client relationship. That said, this situation is common and easy to solve if you follow these steps:
1) Go to their offices and beat the shit out the receptionist. Nothing says Serious Business like a bookish-looking receptionist with a busted jaw!
2) A week later return to their offices and get beaten up by their receptionist. Nothing says Serious Business like a willingness to get your jaw broken by a bookish-looking receptionist. Bonus points if at some point during the fight your penis should accidentally slip out.
3) At the next meeting, leap on their back of the most senior person and yell "Giddyap, chubby horsie man!" Under law that person is then required to grant you three wishes.
4) Offer to turn them on to some free porn sites if the payments are settled. Make a wanking gesture, and wink, while doing this.
5) Visit forums of the Sovereign Citizen community. Ask for legal advice, and do everything they say - even if it appears nonsensical. If Sovereign Citizens won't help, claim you were touched by their mailroom guy.
6) Locate a lawyer familiar with local law and your contractual situation. Punch them in their stupid face. Pow! Did you see that mother go down?