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Geek Weddings and Gift Registries? 38

mrbill writes "Getting married in a week, and the majority of our close friends will ask where we've registered for gifts. Any suggestions on places that allow online registration for geeks, other than doing something like an Amazon wish list?"
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Geek Weddings and Gift Registries?

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  • Yahoo! has a gift registry that's rumoured to be pretty good, with participating etailors like []. I've never used it, so can't really tell you any more about it. Being the lazy thing that I am, I'd probably just go with Amazon's wish list. *grin*

    By the way...congratulations!

  • by ClubPetey ( 324486 ) <.clubpetey. .at.> on Sunday March 25, 2001 @09:43PM (#340341)
    What are you looking to get? Unless your friends/family are all geeks, they will probably wnat to get you something practical, so the trick is to get cool practical stuff. I recommend either Crate & Barrel [] or Williams and Sonoma []. Both has tons of good stuff, and you'll need a lot of kitchen stuff after the marriage. (Actually, I confess, W&S is on the list because I'm a cooking geek, if there is such a thing).

    For those that want to get you something different, register at Home Depot [] for power tools (MORE POWER! I need MORE POWER!) and other hardware. Finally, although they don't have a registry, Firebox [] is a great site for geek stuff.

    Congratulations on getting married!
    He had come like a thief in the night,
  • and just envisioned a 27-year-old man and a 13-year-old boy...
  • Sick Sick Sick. You are a sick bastard.
  • The home depot has a gift registry... And they have CAT5E, Fiber, jacks, etc... does anyone know if thinkgeek has a registry? Shoot, you could just tell people that you are registered there, and even if you aren't, maybe they'll just get you something cool.
  • Thinkgeek has a wishlist (unfortunatly you have to email it to everyone, I'm not sure how that will jive with your sense of wedding propriety)
  • Congratulations!

    You're probably not going to find one online retailer that sells everything you want (although Amazon's trying very hard to do that!), so if you have webspace that you can actually program in, it might not be a bad idea to whip up a little wishlist site of your own. Search the Net for stuff that you like or just use a general description. Let visitors create accounts and check off items on your wishlist. =)

    Might be nice if you can hook into the retailers' sites so that the items are automatically ordered and delivered to your address, but that might be pushing it. Anyway, have fun!

    (Although you probably won't have time to make this - hmm. Convince some of your geek friends to do it for you in lieu of giving you a gift, maybe.)

  • Target!
  • if you have webspace that you can actually program in, it might not be a bad idea to whip up a little wishlist site of your own.

    Congratulations on your upcoming wedding!

    This sounds like it has all the makings of an open-source project! (Sorry, I have no idea if this particular application exists.) BUT, it struck me it might be interesting to see if SLASH: The Slashdot Code [] could be modified for this kind of an application? You time horizon is terribly short so this might not work for you, but let's take a flight of fancy here and play with the idea for a bit.

    I'm thinking you could have different categories and each "article" in the category would identify an item on your list. Imbed links to whatever vendors / sites carried the item. (This lets the linked-to sites host the images and product details, so do you don't have to.)

    Discussions could facilitate pairing up between people so they could purchase an item that was too expensive for one person to afford.

    One issue I forsee is the need to be able to flag an article in some way to indicate its been purchased, so that "Aunt Sue" can just scan down the articles and see what is still available. Maybe mod the post down to a zero and view at a +2 level? (Watch out for this case, though: person A pulls down an "Article" for a, say, CD burner. person B pulls down the SAME article. Person A flags s/he will get it. But, person B cannot see that in their copy, so they could conceivably also flag that they will get one, too. Then again, that may not be an issue if the item was "cash" <grin>)

    As a special bonus, it would make it a heck of a lot easier to identify items and purchasers for sending out thank-you notes!

    Overkill? Sure! But once you worked out the kinks in it, it could also make for an interesting business opportunity in setting up a company to web host this for other couples!

    Once again, best wishes to you and your soon-to-be mate -- gives hope to this geek that I might also find that special someone!

  • "Getting married in a week..."

    You're getting married in ONE WEEK and have yet to register!? I think my wife and I were registered for gifts about SIX MONTHS before the wedding. But then again, perhaps my wedding was a little bit more traditional that a geek-wedding. After all, my wife is an English major -- but that helps keep me from reading nothing but O'Reilly "In a Nutshell" books.
  • Yeah, getting married in a WEEK - and up till now,
    we've been concerned with other things and never
    really thought about registering anywhere.
  • by Anonymous Coward
    Your normal (non geek) relatives may want to shop at a brick-n-mortar store. You on the other hand want online accessibility to add,delete items, etc.

    Many of the department stores have registries which are web enabled via The department store site that seemed to work the best (and what we chose) was Created a registry online and then was able to add to it online as well as with the barcode scanner at the actual store.

    Another good one that lets you create a registry online and then add/maintain items, both online and at the store, is Bed Bath and Beyond.

    Be aware that the websites do not have the whole store's inventory fully searchable online so if you really want the ability to have a full variety of stuff you'll still have to go to the store, get the barcode scanner and walk around. The clerk will also help you list anything you weren't able to find, because their back office system lets them find items by pattern etc., even if they aren't on the shelves.

    Also both and offer the ability for people to buy and have items shipped online, without going to the actual store. Good for lazy gift-givers.

    hope this helps-

  • Check out

    I think they do a great wedding website. They let you combine your registries from many different companies (including all of the ones mentioned so far)

    They also let you set up a wedding website to give people info on all the what/when/where stuff.

    They also have a number of useful features such as an app to track wedding guests, an app to generate text for invites, etc. My fiancee has been spending a lot of time at this site! :-)
  • I highly second that recommendation; I've had two friends who used Target for their registries. They have a goodly amount of geeky stuff, plus "useful" things that you'd find on any couple's registry. And, less tech-savvy (or computerless) guests can get the list and buy gifts in a Target store. Oh, and if you go register in a store, you get to go around with one of the scanner guns to make your picks. That's just fun. ;-)

  • You can use Target, The Pottery Barn, and a lot of the major department stores to do both on-line and brick and morter registries. You actually have to go in and pick things out, but it's fun, and then they put them up online. Very cool. A lot of our gifts were purchased on-line.
  • Yes, there are such people as cooking geeks. W&S is absolutely the best for quality small items (and some larger things - but much of that can be gotten elsewhere for less) for the kitchen. I particularly like the W&S kitchen towels - quite possibly the best kitchen towels I have ever used.

    To be honest, I am not the cooking geek in my family, my GF is. But I can recognize good stuff when I see it, and generally try to get her the best that we can afford so she can make us nice meals...

    Worldcom [] - Generation Duh!
  • Two friends of mine got married near Syracuse, NY. The Bride was registered at CompUSA. The Groom was registered at Crazy Egor's Game Shop. It was an interesting wedding.
  • Too late. Everyone's already gotten your stuff. Be happy with what you end up with...and have an "eBay reverse gift registration" with the stuff that duplicates what you already have.
  • I don't know if they let you actually *register* online [], but they put the registry online for you when you're done, and people can purchase the items online if they want to.
  • For china and silver: Michael Round (

    For the normal stuff, EVERYONE has a web site. Target, Wal-Mart, etc. (Ditto for baby registry).

    If you are getting china or silver, go to the store. It will cost a little bit more for your guests, but if you care about this stuff (and don't register for it if you don't) there IS a difference between various plates and knives and forks. (I wasn't as worried about look as I was feel. If I'm digging into a nice 18 oz. steak, I don't want the fork to bend. Requires a nice bit of counterbalance.)

    And don't underestimate one thing:

    First, you might grow up, sell out, and decide you need this crap. So you may as well start now with the 'traditional' registry.

    Oh, and don't go cheap on the registry thinking that it will help your friends. Put everything on it. They can decide for themselves how much they will spend. Or, they may get creative (like my coworkers did and some of my wife's friends did) and chip in together.

    Go nuts. You've got an excuse: you're getting married. Oh, and manners suggest that people have up to six months to get you a wedding gift (although they are NOT obligated to do so) and you have up to 12 months after the ceremony to send thank you cards.

    "Ettiquette and protocol? Why, it's my primary function sir."

  • you have up to 12 months after the ceremony to send thank you cards.

    WRONG! You have two weeks to send thank yous for all the items you received. The only exception is you get the two weeks from when the item arrives.

    The thank yous are to confirm arrival of mailed items as well as your obligation to show your appreciation.

    That means if you're going on a two-week honeymoon you should do most of them beforehand.

  • Most of the people havent been *notified* yet. 8-)

    We're having a small family-only ceremony,
    then after the honeymoon, we're sending
    announcements (not invitations) to family/
  • Uh, were the bride and groom establishing separate households? I think people are misunderstanding the point of wedding gifts and registries.
  • Also getting married (though not quite so soon!) In anticipation of ensuing planning nightmare (mixing two cultures -- and learning lots about the art of negotiation and bargaining) I've been checking out wedding websites for 8 months.

    I've found that has the most complete information and advice, as well as the most online tools -- including an online gift registry.

    Not many geek toys on the registry (though they have a "high-tech" section) but they have sections to cover all you non-geek needs -- china, flatware, furniture, linens, kitchen goods, small appliances, decorative items, etc. You have to sign up, but if you specify no spam, they send you no spam.

    Your guests wanting a more brick-and-mortar approach can get all the brand names and model numbers from the registry, and work with that. They simply need to go to the knot, and search for your registry by your name. You can than pass the word around that you're registered on without having to send everyone the exact URL -- slightly more tactful.

    Other people on here recommend I've explored there, and it's pretty good, but I find the knot has a lot more information.

  • you have up to 12 months after the ceremony to send thank you cards.

    WRONG! You have two weeks to send thank yous for all the items you received. The only exception is you get the two weeks from when the item arrives.

    I've heard the 12-month rule myself (from sources such as Ann Landers and Miss Manners) but according to The Knot's complete guide to Thank You notes, [] you have up to 2 weeks after the gift arrives for gift sent BEFORE the wedding, and 1 month after you come back from your honeymoon (assuming you go on one right away) for gifts sent on or before your wedding day.

    Either way, thanking your friends and family as soon as possible, and getting notes written beforehand is a really, really good idea.

  • by Zachary Kessin ( 1372 ) <> on Monday March 26, 2001 @04:08PM (#340366) Homepage Journal
    You might not want people to give you geek toys for your wedding. Most geek toys have a short lifespan (a few years) and I would hope your will still be married in 15 or 30 years. You would probably be better off asking for things that you will someday need (like say nice china) but will probably not buy for yourself than something like a bigger hard drive. I would think (ok I'm not married I don't know) that your wedding presents would be things that you would want to use for years and to remeber the people who gave them to you.

  • Online registry ideas:

    In-store registries: Other places to look:

    Believe it or not, some people *want* to give you expensive gifts. We registered for a few things that we really wanted (like a $450/set of pots and pans []) and we got them! The most important stuff to register for is kitchen stuff and sheets/blankets/towels. Honestly, skip the technie stuff... most people (particularly family and close friends) don't want to buy you that kind of gift for your wedding.

    If you have lots of in-town guests, use a local store. If you register at a place like Famous Barr, DON'T also go to Target. Its not worth the time and effort. If you have lots of out of town guests, do something like Target, but make sure that you don't duplicate. Target will allow you to return gifts, but only with a receipt.. but our experience was that they only allow an in-store exchange. Famous Barr was really good about taking stuff back, even things that might not have been bought in their store. If they don't recognize the item, they can probably tell you where it came from. You only have a week though... so you might consider asking for cash instead of gifts. Your poor wife-to-be is probably going crazy right now and the last thing she wants to do is traipse around unending aisles zapping cleaners and silverware.

    Good luck and Congratulations!

    P.S. Other useful wedding planning sites you might want to check out:

  • I've thought about doing something like this myself. I was looking for something like this around Christmas. In addition to wedding gifts, it would be useful for all sort of other gift-giving occasions (baby showers, birthdays, housewarming, etc.).

    I don't think it's overkill. It would be useful for every family to have its own little wishlist management facility.

  • by theguru ( 70699 ) on Tuesday March 27, 2001 @08:46AM (#340369)
    ..which in the long run will make both of you happy.

    My Finace' is a cool chick, but very non-geek. She tolerates toys, and appreciates having a nice home network, but I don't know how she's feel about us getting a lot of geek toys for wedding gifts. As others have pointed out, geek items are usually pretty cutting edge and otherwise have short lifespans. Go with the crystal and the china, but get some other pratical stuff too that you'll both use and enjoy, like matching every day dishes (not the random plates your relatives were throwing away that they gave you in college), matching drinking glasses (those Taco Bell souvenir cups won't cut it), and some good cookware. Register for a good bar set and bar tools. :) Power tools and yard tools are cool and acceptable wedding gifts too. Consumer electronics are also in the realm of possible gifts, but more along the lines of a traditional TV, home stereo, speakers.. you might could sneak a Tivo in there.

    Now, down the line when the two of you are buying/building a house and you want to run fiber to every room and an air conditioned server closet, and she wants a gazeebo and a sitting room, remind her of the china and silver that you use twice a decade. :)
  • If you're registering at Target, you really should do it in-store. Then you get to chase your fiance around with the scanner making ST phaser noises (and the occasional innuendo "Set phasers on 'Caress'":)) while grade schoolers look at you funny. Also, register for power tools - your male relatives will be ecstatic to by them for you, instead of having to hear Aunt Minnie debate herself on the merits of the throw pillow v. the kitchen towels - "Screw that we're getting 'em the circular saw!".

    And, of course, Congratulations!
  • Definitely don't register at Home Depot. The vast majority of tools and hardware made at Home Depot are made deliberately inferior by the manufacturer specially for Home Depot. Quick test: Buy wood screws from Home Depot and wood screws from a good hardware store. Compare screws. Home Depot screws tend to have metal shavings all over the threads whereas the others do not. Just, don't buy stuff at Home Depot, and that is to everyone.
  • Definitely don't register at Home Depot. The vast majority of tools and hardware made at Home Depot are made deliberately inferior by the manufacturer specially for Home Depot. Quick test: Buy wood screws from Home Depot and wood screws from a good hardware store. Compare screws. Home Depot screws tend to have metal shavings all over the threads whereas the others do not. Just, don't buy stuff at Home Depot, and that is to everyone.
  • Here's an idea... What if people buy you things off an online registry but the merchant does not ship until you approve the purchase (or change the items selected)?

    Prior art... you heard it hear first...

  • I've been pondering this very question since I'm getting married & both my fiance and I are mostly geek... and the guests will be too. My current plan is to register at Amazon for toys & electronics, and put up a personal web site for the wedding, showing pointers to other stuff we want. Actually, I'm tempted by a site I came across that allows people to give stock (given how the market is, this may be a cheap gift!) but I decided that was a bit too mercenary. So we're going to go with the MP3 player, the new computer screen (I've been wanting a nice 21" screen since my bf now hogs the machine that has it), probably a docking station for my favorite laptop, and some random kitchen stuff. Given that I'm a grownup (and own a house and all that) I don't need china or silverware, or any of that stuff. I have it already. My nightmare is that every one of my guest will give me a toaster... and I don't even eat toast.

    Anyway, best of luck and if you come up with something brilliant, post it, because the rest of us are looking too.

  • According to Pud [], Wedding Channel is on its way out []
  • I'm getting married this year and started a similar project to keep track of who bought what, who RSVP'd, who's been thanked,etc.

    Project title? GNUly-Wed

  • Just wanted to thank everyone for their
    suggestions. We ended up using Amazon's
    Wish List feature for our geek friends, and
    are going to register @ Target for all of my
    family/friends back home who dont have Internet

One good suit is worth a thousand resumes.